Judge — August 5, 1916 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Why Golf ? Gat isa peculiar game. This remark will doubtless awake a storm of comment among both the initiated and the uninitiated, as much for its start- ling originality as foranything. Bu the fact remains. Golf is a peculiar game. Its marvel- ous growth in the United States is ample proof of that statement. For in- stance, I went out toa public links not so long ago, and although I arrived at the first tee at eleven o'clock, there were one hundred and seven players ahead of me, waiting to start. They started at inter- vals of two minutes. Problem: a, at what hour did I drive off; 6, how much did I pay my caddy, assuming that he cost fifty cents an hour, and that it took two hours and three quarters to play around? That caddy was in my service all the time that I was waiting my turn; and I paid him cheerfully. Which is one of the peculi- arities. The number of men who come to Coun- Clubs to scoff, and remain to play, is marvelous. Jones goes out to sneer at Brown, and make disparaging remarks about Old Men, and Backlot Billiards; and next week Jones is out in full regalia with a set of assorted hardware, making life perfectly wretched for a ball—or better, a dozen balls: the duffer who com- pletes a round with the same ball with which he began being distinctly a rara is—and challenging Brown to a match; and his reputation for veracity is gone g a ‘noe S/S tay with the winds that far around with fragments strewed the se Within a month he is wearing knickerbockers and red stockings—the last stages. An old man’s game? Certainly. Takes your mind off your business? It surely does. A more or less deadly rival of the prop- erly contemplative mood on blowy, sun- shiny Sabbaths? Well, yes. Then, what—? Oh, who can tell? But go out to the Club the next off afternoon you have, and take a whack at that little old ball, and watch it go paraboling off down the course; and breathe in cubic rods of ozone, and let the sunlight soak into you for about four hours; and forget that you are going to skin Smith out of all his negotiable assets, if he doesn’t do it to you first. In short, call it half a de Come on! ¢g {\ L xes and Sevens A MAN may umpire a ball game, and get by with a whole skin—but that doesn’t say he can be nominated for offiee in the teeth of the fact that he is known to be a candidate. 2 Venizelos says Greece isn’t a kingdom but a “democracy with a king.” Fancy Byron's storied aisles of Greece peram- bulating up to the direct primary. 2 Something to worry about: Mr. Hughes likes to play on the pi —Toledo Blade But partisan malignity dare not allege that he practices on the cornet * Bernstorff advised German citizens in the United States to support our govern- ment, but we dare him to advise our neighbors’ chickens to keep out of our garden. ry I take ordets only from my government; make that plain to Carranza.—General Pershii Easier to do, that, if Carranza’s cranial geometry ran less to the solid and more to the plane, e nu can make a hit with a woman by her a “vision.” But you can’t call sight” and get away with it.—Cin- cinnati E Man goes to the altar for the vision— but he goes to Reno for the second sight. e Missing. a jade image of Kwannon, the Chinese goddess of mercy. Reward, $10,000. Page Holland, Dr. Watson— the world’s at war, and mercy’s in Dutch. comicbooks.com