Judge — July 1, 1916 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Fourth of July Parade HERE'S a hint of ing, And a buzz of things a-doing— Humming, drumming through the ait! ‘There's a blur of flags a-flutter, ‘There's a far-off mufiled mutter, And a near-by cracker's splatter In the gutter over there something brew- Now a burst of music brassy By the band in red coats classy Brings the column into view: First, the Spanish War vets daring, Uniforms of khaki wearir Pass with martial bugles b Down the staring avenu uring Next the Civil War division Swinging by with trained precision, Banners by the breezes fanned: Coats a little dull and fraying Heads a trifle bald and Keeping step and not del » the playing of the band One old veteran of the Navy Needn't ask his name—it's * Davy,” On his “land legs” rolling on, Sons of vets and ¢ riskly by with flags outflowing. White garbed girls with bright curls blowing, Faces glowing like the dawn sons going Now the auto-cars that carry Mayor and staff and dignitary, And the others of their class; Fire-department’s engines st Red hose-wagons brightly with their Kiddies screaming as they pass aming, eaming * Ladies ~ heaming— Last, the advertising rabble, And the fuetuating babble OF the stragglers. shufiling by, Close this march of celebration Honoring the * Declaration” Which announced the sure creation Of this nation one July! Mr. Neartown has not been late for the 8.03 local a single morning since his wife bought one of those new tea carts. * How did he get his title of Colonel ?” Independence Day Proverbs A PENNY saved is a penny burned. All that smoulders is not cold. One good burn deserves another. A little fire-cracker is a dangerous thing. Uneasy lies the head that fears a noisy Fourth of July. Never put off till to-morrow the noise you can make to-day. Accidents will happen in the best regulated picnic lunches. Never look a gift toy pistol in the mouth. Harvey Peake. A Pleasant Sight “Yape! said a prominent Arkan- suvyer. “mm right well fixed in the matter of this world’s goods. I've got fourteen children, a sizable passel of hogs and the peartest: bunch of hounds you ever laid your eyes on. And on a sunny afternoon out in the yard, when any- thing is dropped that looks like it might be good to eat, the serab- bling that follers is shore worth watching.” The Joys of Shopping Ihoiter—VYou mean to tell me that you have shopped the livelong day without buying anything? Mrs, Hinter—Ves; bur 1 know what everybody clse got. Weigh O She—Does your friend weigh anchor soon? He—\ won't believe it if he I've helped him weigh fish. does. “ He stopped over two trains in Louisville once.” ig About the Ladies ID you ever stop to think that fifty y ago it took thirty yards of goods to make a young woman a dress? Nowadays you can make a young wo- man a dress with four yards of goods. Well, in fifty years from now we may have to wear shock absorbers. A Prompt Answer Teacher —Tommy, give a sentence in which appears the word “ fireworks.”” “Fireworks to keep us warm,” re- plicd Thomas promptly. Inspiration HIE POET came home with a s heart And sat at his table and wrote it, He said, “Here's a thing of such passion and art, That people will learn it—and quote it. This song by the Muses themselves was. inspired And the crowd will be thrilled when they read it,” But it didn’t get over the way he desired And the world was too busy to heed it. ig in his Yet one of the lyrics the Poet had writ Created a mighty sensation, It made on the instant a wonderful hit And echoed all over the nation. But the Poet was angry, he growled and he cursed For the song which was voted a hummer, A “wonderful, beautiful, lyrical burst” Was inspired—by’a bill from the plumber! © you never can tell with a kiss of a song Exactly the way ‘twill be taken, The wisest of guesses will doubtless be wrong The firmest of judgments is shaken, And maybe that lyric inspired by a bill Went home to each man and each woman, Because it was full of the every-day thrill Of things that were common and human, Berton Braley. comicbooks.com