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Judge, 1916-03-18 · page 6 of 28

Judge — March 18, 1916 — page 6: what you’re looking at

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Judge — March 18, 1916 — page 6: Judge, 1916-03-18

What you’re looking at

This page contains two distinct pieces of satirical content: **Upper Story**: A romantic adventure narrative mocking early wireless technology. A couple stranded on a beach attempts to signal for rescue using an improvised wireless apparatus. The satire targets the era's fascination with cutting-edge technology—the man fashions a transmitter from his watch chain and creates a "cuff" antenna, requiring the woman to stroke his hair to generate static electricity. The "toot toot" sounds suggest either the technology's unreliability or the absurdity of their expectations. The trolley car labeled "Shore Line—Ten-Cent Limit" appearing at the end undercuts the dramatic rescue narrative with mundane reality. **Lower Cartoon ("Not In It")**: A brief exchange between a minister and a "tough kid" about war. The child dismissively rejects the minister's suggestion that his father should handle fighting, boasting he could beat his father himself. This appears to satirize either youthful bravado or, possibly, commentary on class attitudes toward military service during an unstated conflict period. Both pieces employ humor through technological absurdity and deflated expectations.

📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ee i +E “HE CAME UNTO HIS O He obeyed, with trembling eagerness. She shot a glance over her shapely shoulder. “You mean well, but you lack practice,” she opined. “T fancy I'll get enough—before we're out of this.” For the first time he betrayed — cheerful- ne: She shrank from him. “Monster! You trade on op- portunity!” The blood surged to his face. ‘‘Oppor- tunity to be your slave!"” She stamped her slender foot. arrange my rescue—at once!” “Then The man dropped on the sand. Head in hands, he thought for seven minutes, flat. ‘Then he detached from his watch a chain of fine gold wire, closely woven. His ex- pression was grim. In two hours and thirty-nine minutes he had untwisted the chain. He grasped the strands of wire in his left hand. His right put a cuff, folded like a cornucopia, to his ear. The girl’s eyes flashed. “Detachables!" she scorned. think it of you!" “You wrong me. I ripped it off,” he said, with simple dignity. “But why bicker? In the wireless lies our hope. But to send out a call I must have electricity Kindly stroke my hair—the wrong way.” “Never!” she blazed. He was ‘patient. “Understand me! I'm thinking of cats, not caresses. Doubt- less, you recall the common, or garden, pussy. whose back emits sparks under friction. And—er—er—my hair is providentially close-cropped. And we must have current, you know.” Desperate need conquered prejudice. She rubbed his head—savagely. Tears came to his eyes, but he spoke “T didn’t hopefully. everything. changed. Lord, though!” through clenched teeth. telephone that’s st to his lips. phoned wild brightening it yourself. She strained her “There is a sound. It’s atic, more likely, corrected. ‘But it shows we're getting something.” She frowned. “It’s more important to get somewhere. . . But what's that? It was like ‘Toot, toot!’” He was puzzled. “Heard it myself. Must be, we're get- ting a high voltage. But what it means——" She cast aside the cuff ina passion. “If ‘toot, toot’ means anything, it means derision. Con —confound your old wireless!”” He faced her humbly. “If you wish to die here, I'll die happily with you.” She shook her head. “I won't dichere! I must close my e for the last time, wh flowers bloom and birds sing.” “Your choice be mine!” he said. “I go with you.” They climbed the cliffs to the unknown. They gained heights windswept and_ bare. Not a house was insight. Yet, of a sudden, the girl gave a joyous cry: “Saved!” “We have antenna; we have His tone “Lord, I didn’t think know the Morse code or the Continental.” “You're behind the times!” she “It’s the ly up-to-date. ngel!”” he cried, and put the cone “S$. 0. S.! S.0.S.1" he mega- Then he listened, his face “Jove, I hear something! He gave her the folded cuff. I don’t The said vireless lap! I’m broke. the ship. think of stocking — I—well, run fare.” NOT IN Minister—You're too young to be thinking of war. should let your father do the fighting. Tough kid—Father nuthin’! lick him! groaned. “Saved ? She flushed daintily. ahead and when [ overtake you, I'll LT and WN AND HIS OWN RECEIVED HIM NOT” Before them was a road, and along the road rumbled a trolley car, labeled “Shore Line—Ten-Cent Limit.” apped his pocket, and No; lost I left all my mone In the terrible confusion I didn’t in the “T did! 1 stop the car, pay ye You Say, mister, mother can comicbooks.com