Judge — December 4, 1915 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Yuletide Fancies Your Better Half ER stony eye denotes a squall, You'd think she had strabismus, If you don’t come across with all The coin she wants for Christmas. Cranks They come all siz But this much it The most detested crank of all Is be who gets a Christmas grouch, t and small, safe to vouch: Modernized As teindect may be out of date, And autos love to he With airships risky things at most, Santy may use the parcel-post The Annual Puzzle Once more he eyes it on the shelf, And meditates with mind adrift; His best gis] made it all herself ‘And sent it as his Christmas gift. The Christmas Touch “There are so many things I must buy,” She says, as she starts in to cry; But what is more funny When you hand her the money There isn't a tear in her eye. Seasonable Joys Madge, just because she thinks it shocking, Woo't show where hangs her Christmas stocking; But she is wise and lets me know Jat where she hangs the mistletoe. J.J. O'Connell, Must Have Them Crowford—You scem to think your wife the most unreasonable woman in the world. Crabshaw—Y ou see I mortgaged the house to buy her an auto, and now she wants me to raise money on the car to purchase Christmas presents. Twins Crusty—I hear you have an addition to your family. Pater—Yes—put down one and carry two. . Ideal Spot Madge—It’s foolish to put any Christmas decorations in this out-of-the-way corner. You have it so cluttered up not more than two could squeeze in there. Marjorie—You little goose, that’s where I'm going to hang my mistletoe. He Meant Business RS. BENNETT arrived at the con- clusion that the attachment of Teddy Nolan, the policeman, for her cook must be investigated, lest it prove disastrous to domestic discipline. One morning she took Annie, the cook, to task regarding the matter. Annie admitted his attentions. “Do you think he means_ business, Annie?” asked Mrs. Bennett. “Yis, mum, Oi t’ink so,” replied Annie, “Annyway, he’s begun t6 complain about my cookin’, mum.” Weavers of Speech these weavers of speech sit silently at the switchboards, swiftly and skillfully interlacing the cords which guide the human voice over the country in all directions. Whether a man wants his neighbor in town, or some one in a far-away state; whether the calls come one or ten a minute, the work of the operators is ever the same—making direct, instant communication evcrywhere possible. This is Bell Service. Not only is it necessary to provide the facilities for the weaving of speech, but these facil- ities must be vitalized with the skill and intelligence which, in the Bell System, have made Universal Service the privilege of the millions. Upon the magic looms of the Bell System, tens of millions of telephone messages are daily woven into a mar- velous fabric, representing the count- less activities of a busy people. Day and night, invisible hands shift the shuttles to and fro, weaving the thoughts of men and women intoa pattern which, if it could be seen as a tapestry, would tell a dramatic story of our business and social life. In its warp and woof would mingle success and failure, triumph and trag- edy, joy and sorrow, sentiment and shop-talk, heart emotions and million- dollar deals. The weavers are the 70,000 Bell op- erators. Out of sight of the subscribers, AMERICAN TELEPHONE AND TELEGRAPH COMPANY AND ASSOCIATED COMPANIES One System Bayes VOuW ish pas if tid Eaten eaten eet ec Lachnite Gems = Sie | Bae ant ret Qe . ) Qrengnen g operas | ROMEIKE’S weet yout nape hich may appear al You, your Inends, or any Subject on which you may want to be “up-to-date.” Every newspaper and periodical of importance in the United States and Europe is searched. Terms, $5.00 for 100 notices. HENRY ROMEIKE, 106-110 Seventh Ave., N, Y. One Policy Universal Service AVOID THIS AD! TDW unless you have talent for drawing. Send four cents in stamps for full information. ZIM’S Correspond- ence School of Cartooning, Comic Art, and Caricature, Box_R, Horseheads, N.Y. “MADE AT al GARS comicbooks.com