Judge, 1915-09-04 · page 16 of 27
Judge — September 4, 1915 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This humorous story contrasts two young women debating the merits of men versus dogs (specifically a Pomeranian). The girl in pink prefers her dog because it's affectionate without demands—it doesn't ask her to kiss its mustache or need expensive gifts. The girl in yellow argues men have advantages: they buy limousines, take you to cabarets, and have money. However, the satire's punch comes in the ending: both women ultimately reject real men. The girl in pink marries a rough prize-fighter she'll obey; the girl in yellow marries a Chicago packer. Neither marriage works out. Both end up alone, consoling themselves with expensive dogs instead. The joke targets female sentimentality and poor judgment in love—a common Judge magazine theme mocking women's logic. The subtitle "A Pomeranian in the Manger" suggests both women selfishly keep what they won't use (romantic partnership), settling instead for pampered pets and failed marriages.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
LOVE’S INCONSISTENCIES (Being a Tale of a Pomeranian in the Manger) * the lithe under Now he rl an nk and then resuscitated nauseating chocolate-drop. Lin yelk she said, “but even so, I prefer a man.” men,” mused the girl in smothered we PPERE! young avalanche of kisses The g dear little ears,” “They're really very much alike, dogs ¢ except that men can’t bark so well.” thought this a bit unfair. in pink The girl in yell “Men,” may not be such accomplished barkers, but they can buy limou- And then, they have pockets.” *Men are a she said, sand take one to cabarets. The girl in pink kissed her Pomeranian a bores,” sh id That's because they can talk,” said the other girl that can talk is a bore.” The girl in pink chose a crescent-shaped nougs “A dog,” she said, with a loving glance at the over-fed Pomeran “never asks you to kiss its red moustache or tie its white gain. vful “ Anything for her pet tic “But it never buys you a hat, cither,” said the girl “Think of a dog! no money—no appreci the higher arts!” “Think of a man! yellow No conscience ion of uid the girl in pink. “No originality—no table manners—no appreciation of the higher prices!"” SPE By BERTON NO Dearest, if Bless y EAREST LADY of my Heart, ve the Suffrage # ye love to start Great poli The With the ¢ Still, Th With a gh you ame Ivocating ¢ yo claim 1 want the vote, heart, you're we sina ha w the wicked men oppress ye “But a man can be wicked, ane The girl in yellow stopped abruy ionally trespassing on the domain of common sense Well,” said the girl in pink, “none of the men J know are inter. they're bored to death doing nothing. she found herself u nc and too tired to do anything els I know,” rough men with bulgy muscles. I'd love to a prize-tig whenever I disobeyed him!” The girl in pink shuddered, anc allegretti.. Whereupon it, too, shu “Or a stevedore!” continued the other. body of a Hercules, the head of an Apollo “But I'm sure a stevedore would drink cream in his of lemon,” said the girl in pink. “And even tho drink tea, one can always rely on it never to lea here are other men: said the girl in yellow. “But ¢ Cave who'd men, you know knock m big how marry ter fed her Pomeranian « dered. \ stevedore cup.” But before the defender of man could object, the maid anno You see, the girl in pink, who loved do; Lin yellow, wh a gentleman gaged to a Chicago packer; and the gir wasn't engaged at all, and comforted herself by keeping a kennel of very expensive dogs. Charles A. Mer ECHES BRALEY Heart anc In the Sa But I Foolish love tal Publicly you may “Vot Please di ne to it!