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Judge, 1915-07-03 · page 26 of 32

Judge — July 3, 1915 — page 26: what you’re looking at

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Judge — July 3, 1915 — page 26: Judge, 1915-07-03

What you’re looking at

This is a humorous anecdote by Ed A. Goewey about **Bill Carrigan**, manager of the Boston Red Sox, illustrating the clash between academic refinement and baseball culture. The joke hinges on a professor's complaint that players use excessive slang and poor English during games. The manager attempts to reform their speech using elaborate, polite language ("impart a little more energy," "locomotive celerity"). This backfires comically: the players don't understand him, he becomes distracted during play (causing errors), and he abandons the experiment entirely—immediately reverting to crude baseball vernacular ("Spank it on the nose, Bill!"). A secondary punchline involves an umpire trying to enforce civility, only to be heckled by a grandstand spectator with identical grammar errors, suggesting that crude language is endemic to the sport and social class. The satire mocks both pretentious academic interference in sports and the futility of imposing "civilized" speech on working-class ballplayers.

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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

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