Judge, 1915-02-13 · page 23 of 24
Judge — February 13, 1915 — page 23: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several humorous short anecdotes and advertisements typical of early 20th-century American satirical journalism. **The jokes** mock ordinary people's foolishness: a farm boy asking about advancement (told he'll "rise" by waking at 4am), a lawyer charging $2 to advise an embezzler to plead guilty, a man paying twice to have snow cleared, a traveling salesman confused why a train station is near the railroad, and a husband deliberately angering his wife to avoid her financial demands. **The advertisements** include: - Egyptian Deities cigarettes, marketed as superior to competitors - Studio of Pictorial Art offering illustration instruction under "Grant Hamilton" - The Keeley Treatment, a dubious medical remedy claiming to cure alcoholism and drug addiction The page reflects period attitudes: casual endorsement of questionable "cures," emphasis on hustling and petty deceptions, and humor based on class stereotypes. The content is mostly filler material between ads, typical of Judge's format.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
try dealer of Baltimore. ‘ and night you must look after your birds the same as you look after horses. ; . California turkeys are very fine. They are very well taken care of. It is no snap ervork on a California turkey farm, I tell yet was visiting a California turkey farm last month when a boy applied for a job. ‘Your references are good. I'll try you," said the farmer. ; * Will [have a chance to rise, sir?? the boy asked. “Yes,” said the farmer; ‘a grand chance. Pl want you to have the feed mixed by four o'clock every morning.” ""— Washington Star. Toking It All—"‘Before I agree to under- take your defense," said the eminent crim- inal lawyer, “you will have to tell me the whole truth, Did you embezzle the hun- dred thousand dollars you are accused of having taken?"" “Yes, sir,"’ replied the accused man, “Tl not attempt to cone the fact from you, [stole every cent of it.” “How much of it have you still?’ “It’s all gone but a couple of dollars. “Young mar id the eminent lawy: buttoning his coat about him and putting on his gloves, ‘you had better plead guilty and throw yourself on the mercy of the court."" “Til do it if you say so, sir, What are you going to charge me for the advice: “Two dollars.’’—Ladies’ Home Journal. Working the Systen—‘'I'll clean th’ snow off yer walk fer a quarter."* “Why, I just paid a quarter to have it ved 1°" ‘ain't half done.’ me, come! Th. fellow-worker!"* “Oh, dat’s all right—he's me pardner." —Cleveland Plain Dealer, isn’t a nice wa The Explanation—One afternoon a trav eling salesman from a bigg city happened in the little town of Cranbury, N. J.. and after completing his business, he started to re- turn to the railroad station, which is quite adistance from the town proper. “Talk about towns,"* he breathlessly re marked to a na #8 he eventually reached the platform, ‘this dump is certainly the limit!" ve lost no end of good time beating it over that bloomin’ road !"* impatiently con- tinued the salesm. “What do you sup- pose they put the station so far from the town for?** “Derned if I know,"* carelessly answered the native, ‘unless they wanted to have it near the railroad track."'—Philadelphia Tele- Kraph. Shrewd Old Man—"* You're an old mar- ried man. What do you do when your wife begins to scold?** “Encourage her. [talk back—discreetly, of course. I say tantalizing things. I make foolish excuses. I stammer and get husky."* “But doesn’t that make her a good deal madder?"* “Of course it docs. ‘That's the intention. T want her to get so mad that she won't have any voice left to ask me for money."* “Gee! T wonder if I'll ever get as hard- ened as that !"'"—/irooklyn Eagle. EGYPTIA DEITIES t rs | The Utmost in Ci igarettes Plain End ovCorkTp ‘People of culture. refinement und S/ / Egypt ian education invariably Deities to any other You can’t sell your drawings and you can only acquire this technique under skilful guidance. In comic art partic become a skilled afinished musician and play only by ear. Men are born with genius, but art is the practical and skilful application of natural ability. We send you this comes under the personal direction of Mr. Grant Hamilton, an artist of international reputation. This school has been established s and has developed many first-class illustrators who are cleven yea now earning good Only a limited number of students will be taken, so write at once. Studio of Pictorial Art, Inc., 172 Fifth Avenue, New York tinuing the use of our remedies. Mot Sprtogs, tek. rok Strowe Mktg. + Dowgtas Nig cularly, the clever caricature depends altogether on a proper understanding of what to emphasize and what to omit, and this knowledge can only be had through instruction. You cannot eley Treatment APPETITE FOR DRUGS OR DRINK Drunkenness and drug using are nervous diseases. Our scientific treatment restores nerve cells to original unpoisoned conditions—does not nauseate. No inconvenience exper FOR INFORMATION WRITE TO FOLLOWING KEELEY INSTITUTES: //Tarkishand PREFER arettes. cigaretie . in theWortd unless they are technically correct tist without instruction any more than you could be instruction by mail and your individual training incomes from their art. Established 1908 TAKES AWAY THE ‘ed in discon- Half a million successfully treated in thirty-five years. alt Labe Clty, Vad comicbooks.com