Judge, 1914-06-13 · page 5 of 24
Judge — June 13, 1914 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
The top cartoon titled "A Mad World" depicts a chaotic riverside scene with well-dressed figures in a carriage pulled by oxen, accompanied by horses and dogs. The subtitle states "No joke accompanies this drawing. It is foolishly enough as it is"—suggesting the image's absurdity speaks for itself without explanation. Below are two pieces: a poem called "The Bungalow" by Clinton Scollard expressing pastoral domestic wishes, and "Tango Constellation" illustrating a couple dancing the tango—a controversial dance of the era. The right column contains "A June Honeymoon Lexicon," humorous definitions mocking newlywed euphemisms and honeymoon clichés, including satirical takes on romantic activities and wedding souvenirs. The page satirizes Gilded Age courtship, marriage customs, and popular dance crazes.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
The Bungalow H, I'D like to have (now, wouldn't you?) A little bungalow for two, With a bit of shade above the eaves, Where I could hear the laugh of the leaves; And somewhere near a plot of ground, Where I could go and mess around, And feel as free as a vagrant grig, And dig — if I happened to want to dig! And watch the flowers smile up at me, And jest with passing bird or bee; And have her come (for she'd be there!) With sunlight glinting upon her hair. (And dimples playing at hide-and-seek — Rose and snow upon her cheek!) And have her whisper, low and sweet, “Dear, don’t you think that it’s time to eat!” Oh, I’m going to have (should she not say tino!) Just such a little bungalow! Clinton Scollard. A MAD WORLD No joke accompanies this drawing. TANGO CONSTELLATION The Big and Little Dipper It is foolish enough as it is. A June Honeymoon Lexicon Kissa mouthquake occasioned by the contact of two heavenly bodies in the course of their flight around the honeymoon. Rice throwing—A cereal story that gives the whole thing away to the ob- servers on the train. The world—Paradise. Scenery—Her countenance. Hug—A soul clinch, Pout—S. O. S. for a kiss. Quarrel—An eclipse of the honeymoon. Tunnel—A kiss oasis in the desert of a long railroad journey. Souvenir—A spoon illustrated with a view which another spoon prevented the purchaser from seeing. Biscuit—An adamantine rock of the early hymeneal era. Old shoe--A fourteen-inch shell used in firing the bride’s salute. Flat— An architectural recess into which two may squeeze by hugging up close. —Stuart B, Stone, comicbooks.com