Judge — April 18, 1914 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

I it Make It a Bottle of Cook’s Let your order express the dif- ference between mere money spending and buying the wine you like— lively as a cricket—pure as purity—every sip a surprise in deliciousness, Foreign wines cost more because somebody has to pay import duty and shipping charges. American Wine Co. 8T. LOUIS and all who contemplate marriage Should Own this complete informative book e Science of a New Life” By JOHN COWAN, M. D. d revomem Every Married Couple igious critics S. Unfolds the secrets of married happiness, 80 often revealed too late! No book like it to be had at the prices We can only give a w of the chapter subjects here as this k ia not meant for children. (Agents J.S. Ogilvie Publishing Co., Sh 7sut which he knew less. Presently the maiden asked archly, “Of course you've read ‘Romeo and Juliet’?"’ He floundered helplessly for a moment, and then, having a brilliant thought, blurted out happily, “I've read ‘Romeo’ !'"— Peoria Journal. Perfidy of London—After much debate on the dangers and risks to be encoun- tered, McHaggis decided to leave his home in the Highlands for a week-end trip to London. The old folk at home waited anxiously for their Jock’s return, and, when the hour came for the train to arrive, trooped in a body to the station to welcome him. Jock seemed very silent, and the fam- ily glanced apprehensively at each other. Could he have lost his heart to the wiles of some Sassenach siren? When all were gathered round the blaz- ing fire in the evening, his old mother put the dreaded question. “What ails ye, Jock? Ye've no’ told us onything aboot Lunnon. Is it no’ the fine place they would have us believe?"’ “Oh, aye, it’s nay so bad!"? answered Jock. Then suddenly his indignation flared up. ‘‘But they’re no’ honest up there !’" “Whit way are they no’ honest, Jock?’" “*Weel, I had my doots all the time, but I made sure the day. I bought a packet of pins at the station for a penny, and on the cover it said there were one thousand pins insid Weel, I counted them in the train, and—would you believe it?—there were only nine hundred and _ninety- three !"’"—London Answers. It Wasn't Agony— Mrs. Jones went shopping one afternoon, accompanied by her husband, and as they emerged from a store after a busy seance, hubby noticed that mother wasn't acting naturally. Be- neath a spotted veil her face was under- going a series of fearful contortions, twisting first to the right and then to the left. “*What’s the matter, Mary?” asked the old man, in alarm. ‘‘Are you ill?" “Of course not, silly !"’ answered wifey, as the contortions continued. ‘‘I never felt better in my life."" “Then what in the world are you doing with your face?’’ wonderingly demanded father. ‘What am I doing?’’ answered mother, exposing both hands, which were full of bundles. ‘Why, I’m trying to get my veil down over my chin.’’—Philadelphia Telegraph. Alarm by Telephune—A young lady took down the receiver of the telephone one day and discovered that the line was in use, “T just put on a pan of beans for din- ner,’’ she heard one woman inform an- other. She hung up the receiver and waited for the conversation to end. Returning to the telephone, she found the women still talking and broke into the conversa- tion. ‘!Madam, I smell your beans burning,”’ she announced. A scream greeted the remark, and the young lady was able to put in her call. — Everybody's Magazine. BUY. NDEstrucT[] BAGGAGE | Compare the Indestructo with any other trunk |made, See it side by side with other trunks in | the stores. | You will find that not one of them has the dis. | tinctive features of the Indestructo—that NOt one | of them gives you the same solid assurance of Teal worth and service—not one of them is so welj able to care for itself in the crash and crush of hard baggage handling. One proving bit of evidence as to the standing of Is. destructo ‘Irunks in the business world is the way leading merchants—the best and wisest merchants hare accepted the Indestructo, Remember that no other trunk can give you the se. vice, satisfaction, tne beauty and the lasting value, and the special Five Years Insurance and Registry feature that are all yours with the Indestructo Trunk. tis worth your while to buy right and be satisfied. Say to yourself The next trunk I buy will be an Inde. structo”—then make good on that promise. Our basket explains that fully—ask for it, National Veneer Products Company Street Mishaweka, Indian Free to S Use Any Piedmont Southern Red Cedar Chest in our catalog shipped on 15 day.’ free trial, A Piedmont protects furs, w and ice, dust and damp. Useful, beaut f quickly to whet Low factory peices eieated eatalog aod Look, Stary Dept. 97,__ Statesville, HEN you say, "Here’s how" over a Club Cocktail, you attain the ultimate in good drinking. Because Club Cocktails are the finest drink in the world. They're smooth and mellow, with the rare fragrance of selected old liquors, expertly mixed and aged in wood. Order your particular kind from your dealer today. G. F. HEUBLEIN & BROTHER New York Hartford London In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com