Judge — March 21, 1914 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Copyright, 1914, by Leslie Judge Company Y Reuben John A, Sleicher, President. Entered at the P ed weekly by dress,“ Judgark.” Tel. 6682 Madison, Waldron, Editor, Vol. LXVI. March 21, 1914 E D Marital Gallantry EXAMPLE of marital de- votion full of happy sug- gestion recently startled New York, thanks to the newspapers. It is well known in the remotest of localities— thanks also to the newspa- pers—that an English wom- an with a title and great beauty amazed London not long ago by dancing in public in bare feet and a classic costume that did not embarrass her movements. Lon- don society gasped, but it went to see her finally, and she became an entertainer of great vogue. Europe produces no entertaining sensa- tion of this sort that is not in good time imported, for there is also money here for such a dancer and for the entrepreneur fortunate enough to engave her. So this lady is now entertaining in this country, protectively accompanied by her titled husband. Dancing in the New York cabarets, this dancer excites and satisfies curiosity. At one of these places, according to a news- paper, her feet pained her during her exercise, and her husband undertook to bathe them with club soda in full view of the audience. A waiter entered, bearing a tray of champagne, a tipple commonly indulged by the habitues of cabarets. He was so amused at the spectacle of the husband bathing the wife's feet with club soda that he laughed. This angered the husband, who punched the waiter in the eye. ‘‘The trouble ended soon,’’ says the newspaper, ‘‘the foot washing was resumed and the dance went on.”” A well-trained waiter never laughs at T O R I anything but a funny story told by a client who has not yet tipped him, and this waiter was probably discharged. But the waiter was a minor figure in an epi- sode which proves that marital gallantry has not become obsolete. Let ‘Em Have Their Fun A STARTLING suggestion was made in Washington the other day by a Western senator. He declared that ‘‘something more is required nowadays to be a congressman than to wear a frock coat, a white tie and send out garden seed.’’ This senator added that Washington’s gay social life, with its tango teas, din- ners, receptions, theater parties and the like, is responsible for a flagrant lack of vim and action in Congress, whose mem- bers expend their vitality and dull their wits away from the capitol. Well, do not many congressmen from remote points naturally desire when they get to Washington to make the most of opportunity? Is the capital not the one place in all the country where they can learn how to dress and comport them- selves in a fashionable manner? And who would expect a congressman from a place where life is dull and monotonous to avoid the inspiriting entertainments that Washington offers? Besides, how many congressmen really know just what to do for the country’s good, and why should they worry about it as long as their constituents get the garden seed? No. 169 A L Are You Felonious? T MAY be good, after all, that the police are prone to laxity. Upon the statute-books of New York are some two hundred felonies. Just how many of these the average man commits each day it would be impossible to tell, but if be managed to escape them all but one, thet would make about five million felonies daily in New York City alone, and five million felonies a day, properly attended to, charged, pleaded, tried, convicted and punished, would demand so many police and such elaborate court machinery as to leave time for little else. The police should be thanked, then, for being able to wink the other eye judi- ciously, thus saving hundreds of thou sands in taxes and other inconveniences, even though they cannot wink away guilty consciences, Brief Decisions CONGRESS votes six millions for heavy artillery to guard our coasts, and Mr. Carnegie at once donates two millions for international peace, so that all the big guns want peace at any price. “Eat garlic freely and you will lives hundred years’’ says one of those news- paper health experts. At least you will feel as if you had lived a hundred years and all your friends had passed away. [s) That Swiss boy who was born with two stomachs has an unfair advantage st meals, but, on the other hand, wait until he eats a green apple. G A violinist made $15,000 in stock spec- ulations. Wall Street, having had the dance, pays the fiddler. comicbooks.com