Judge, 1913-12-20 · page 18 of 24
Judge — December 20, 1913 — page 18: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **travel advertising** for American steamship lines, not political satire. The dominant content promotes luxury cruises to warm-weather destinations (Florida, Cuba, Puerto Rico, Mexico, Texas, Bahamas) as winter escapes for wealthy travelers. The copy emphasizes comfort and "smooth summer seas." The right column contains brief **humorous anecdotes** unrelated to the advertisements—jokes about a man getting a black eye from a domestic dispute, grocery price haggling, and a failed circus act with trained chickens. These are generic comic relief, not political commentary. The lower section advertises a "20th Century Wonder" business opportunity (likely a vacuum cleaner or similar household device), using typical hard-sell language about guaranteed profits. The page reflects early 20th-century American leisure culture and advertising conventions, with no identifiable political figures or satirical targets visible.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Where Winter is Onlya Name Take one of the AGWI Steamship Lines and sli southward over smooth, summer seas to the lands where winter is only a name, to— Florida—Cuba—Porto Rico—Mexico Texas—Bahamas— Santo Domingo THE RIVIERA OF AMERICA THE COMING COUNTRY Florida, land of Ezernal Fl. is best reached Texas, land of ity! You owe it a Fy iis iuteios neomers ofthe Ciyde Line wale | scll'te ce i Ves Galeton, Ailstie Chy of i the Southwest; San Antonio, Aransas Pass, ing four times weekly from New York direct to Christi and other celebrated resorts, The Jacksonville — calling at Charleston — without Corpus changes Key West, Tampa, St. Petersburg and Mallory Line is the only direct route to Texas the West Coast by the splendid steamers of the without change; best way to California and Pacific Mallory Line—direct without change. Write for | Coast. For interesting descriptive matter, rates, rates, reservations, etc. etc, write Clyde Steamship Company Mallory Steamship Company Pier 36, North River, New York Pier 45, North River, New York THE ISLAND OF ENCHANTMENT Porto Rico, rightly named “Rich Port,” is rich in traditions, interest and products, You can reach CUBA—MEXICO—BAHAMAS Reached by the 'b steamers of the Ward Line. The most delight way to visit Nassau, seat of the British Colonial Government; Hovana, the “Little Paris” with its ideal climate, excellent hotels and delightful social diversions; and Mexico with its ancient monuments and historic ruins. For in- teresting booklets, rates, etc., write New York & Cuba Mail S. S. Co., (Ward Line) Pier 14, East River, New York j DISTRICT PASSENGER OFFICES BOSTON-192 Washington St. CHICAGO-—444 Com'I Nat'l Bank Bldg. PHILADELPHIA-—701 Chestnut St. WASHINGTON- 1306 F St. N. W. NEW YORK-290 Broadway it in four and one half days and remain on board during delightful cruise around the island. Weekly sailings from New York; big, 10,000 ton steamers; luxunious accommodations; fare one way, $45 and up. Write for booklet and all information. ‘The New York & Porto Rico S.S. Co. 11 Broadway, New York Tae 5 DROP DEAD ONES. AWAKE [] AGENTS ! GRAB THIS NEW INVENTION THE 20th CENTURY WONDER Get started in an honest, clean, reliable, money-making business. Sold on a cten asll ey-back guarantee VACUL imo. Pi 80 per day. “sorters ete bt jemon: * tection given free 4 sarticlo ever invented. Wil Passing the Mustard The One To Get Hurt—‘‘What’s the matter with your eye, Mike? “Sure, is it black?”’ “It certainly is black.”’ “Well, I saw an altercation between man and wife yesterday.” “And did you mix up in it?” “IT did not. I was only an innocent by- stander. ''— Yonkers Statesman, A Good Salesman—‘*What?"’ cried the careful housewife. ‘‘You charge me one dollar a bushel for these potatoes?”’ “Yes, ma’am,’’ answered the polite grocer. ‘‘That is the very lowest price we can sell them for.’” ‘ “‘How is it that I can get them from Brown’s for ninety cents, then?” “I cannot say, madam. Perhaps Mr, Brown has taken a fancy to you. He isa widower and you are beautiful. Unfor- tunately, I— Yes’m, one dollar.” — Cleveland Plain Dealer. Tough Season—Hem—Isn’t that Raven- yelp? Haw—Yes; he is just back from a trip on the road. Hem—What was he doing this season? Haw—Exhibiting a troupe of trained chickens. Hem—What happened to the show? Haw—Business got bad and he had to eat the performers.— Youngstown Tele- gram. Stopping the Supply of Hot Air—Mrs. Waggles—Were you rude to that life- insurance man? Mr. Waggles—Why, no! I just told him I wished he would go down cellar and talk into our furnace.— Somerville Jour- nal, Getting It Right—‘‘Is your husband in the habit of smoking between meals?” inquired the doctor of the patient’s wife. “Well, no, not exactly,” she replied; “with him it’s a case of eating between smokes."’—Springfield Union. Merry Maidens A maiden at Rawlings, Wyoming, By the window her hair she stood combing. Said a man in the street, “Golly, Mike! ain’t she sweet?" And she was, standing there in the gloam- ing. —Dizon Merritt, in Nashville Banner. A maiden in Springfield, Missouri, When asked could she serve on a jury And be just to each side, Bobbed her head and replied, “I could ladle out justice like fury.’’ —Judd M. Lewis, in Houston Post. A maiden who lives in Shenango Thought she'd take a wee fling at the tango; When she flew in the air And lost all her back hair, She said, ‘‘Goodness! where did my bang go?" —Charles A. Leedy, in Youngstown Tele- gram, A maiden who lived in Schoharie Was in a great hurry to marry; But after the wedding She found such hard sledding, She cried, ‘‘Now in Reno I'll tarry !"" GREAT HEAT SPRING WATE “Ita Purity Has Made It Fai comicbooks.com Upv