Judge — November 15, 1913 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Passing the Mustard Natural—Mrs. Longwed—Such a cheeming husband Mrs. Pickle has! So tender after ten years of marriage! Mr. Longwed—Quite natural! It would make a rhinoceros tender to be kept in hot water ten years.—Albany Evening Jour- nal. Turn About—‘‘I’m sorry I snubbed that young bank clerk on the street.”” “Failed to know him, eh?’’ “Yes; and to-day he got even. I hada check to cash, and he failed to know me."’ —Washington Herald. -*Have you ‘Deeds of Daring’?”’ inquired the lady in the book store. “Yes, madam,”’ responded the bright clerk. ‘‘Here is a little pamphlet en- titled ‘How To Call Down the Janitor.’’’ —Chicago News. . Solder in the Woodshed—‘‘I saw your father taking you to the woodshed yester- day morning, Willie. What had you been doing?”” “Nothing. He just took me out there to meet a soldier friend of his.’’ “A soldier. Who was he?"’ “Corporal Punishment.’’—Detroit Free Press. Yes and No—He—Your friend, Miss Wabash, is quite chic, Miss Breezy. Miss Breezy (a trifle enviously)—Yes, Clara may be a trifle chic, but she is no chicken. —Harper's Bazar. A Si “Beware, young man! It’s the first false step that counts. You'll be in politics next.’” “What am I doing, dad?” “Ain't that a glass of grape juice in your hand?’ Pittsburgh Post. Proof—‘‘Is Dodds egotistical?” “Yes, indeed. Why, every time he stands on astreet corner, he thinks he’s in public life!’’ -Birmingham Age-Herald. A Tragedy—‘‘That horrid woman has broken up my home!’” “Taken away your husband?”’ “No; the cook.’’—Baltimore American. Called to Account—‘‘See here,’’ said his wife. ‘I hear you acted scandalous on that trip with those Knights of Sparta.”’ “Me? How's that?”’ “Mr. Wombat says you posed as the Isaac Walton of the party. What do you mean by going around under an assumed name?’ — Boston Advertiser. Fond of Hers--The two women were dis- cussing the fashions. “Did you say your husband was fond of those clinging gowns?" “Yes, indeed; he likes one to cling to me for about five years." — Cincinnati Enquirer. Wrong Going or Coming —‘‘Maria,”’ peroly asked” Mr. Dorkins, “is that worthless young whipper snapper of a Dick Doogood still Sceatag to see Bessie "7 “What do you mean by talking that way, John?"’ said Mrs. Dorkins. ‘He hasn't been here in six weeks.”” “‘Hasn’t he? Is the scoundrel trifling with her affections?""—Chicago Tribune. Finish This Story for Yourself—_ The girl got $6.00 a week, and was lonely. “Piggy’—you can imagine his kind—was waiting down stairs. He knew where champagne and music could be had. But that night she didn’t go. That was Lord Kitchener’s doing. But another night? O. HENRY tells about it in this story, with that full knowledge of women, with that frank facing of sex, and jae clean mind that have endeared him to the men and women of the and, This is but one of the 274 stories, in 12 big volumes, you get for 25 cents a week, if you send the coupon. __ From the few who snapped up the first edition at $125 a set before it was off the press, to the 50,000 who have eagerly sought the beau- tiful volumes offered you here—from the stylist who sits among his books to the man on the street—this whole nation bows to O. ~4] Henry—and hails him with love and pride—our greatest writer Sy A NY of stories. To Those Who Are Quick KIPLING (6 volumes) Given -Away Never was there an offer like this. Not only do you get your 274 O. Henry stories in 12 volumes at less than others paid for one volume of the first edition, but you get Kipling’s best 179 short stories and poems and his long novel—without paying a cent. You get 18 volumes, packed with love and hate and laughter. A big shelf full of handsome books. Send the Coupon and you will understand why “O. Henry” is hailed as “ The American Kipling”; “he Y.M.C.A. Boccaccio”; “The Master of the Short Story’; ‘Creator of a New Literature’; “Discoverer of Ro- mance in New York’s Street’; “The American de Maupassant’; “The Homer of the Tenderloin”; “Founder of a New Style"; “America’s Great- est Story Teller”; “The 20th Century Al-Rashid who takes you to every corner of his beloved Bagdad—New York.” -Send Coupon and you will under- stand as never before why other nations are going wild over him Why memorials to him are being prepared; why universi- ties are planning tablets to his memory; why text-books of English literature are including his stories; why col- leges are discussing his place in literature; why theatrical firms are vying for rights to dramatize his stories; why newspapers all over the country are continually offering big sums for the right to re- print his stories. Send the Coupon Without Money You get both sets free on approval. If you don’t laugh ting. bowed tn ath, and cry over them—if you don’t read and re-read and shee the keoet Lvl emit love them—send them back. Otherwise 25 cents a week pays for them all. Don’t wait—send the coupon to-day. ‘This offer is too good to last. It’s only the avalanche of disappointed letters that made us extend it this long. Send the coupon to-day and be glad. REVIEW OF REVIEWS COMPANY //czsvssisucenmanutis 30 Irving Place New York ‘Wrous binding, send 81.5) for 13 swmtha In answering advertisements please mention: JUDGE, It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com