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Judge, 1913-10-04 · page 20 of 24

Judge — October 4, 1913 — page 20: what you’re looking at

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Judge — October 4, 1913 — page 20: Judge, 1913-10-04

What you’re looking at

This page is primarily **advertisements and filler content**, not political satire. The main elements are: **Advertisements** dominate: Beeman's Pepsin Gum, "Vulcan" ink pencils, The Giant Heater, gold rings with diamonds, a correspondence art school, a "Wizard Repeating Liquid Pistol" (dog repellent), and Hunter Baltimore Rye whiskey. **Poetry section** ("Shear Steals"): Contains poems by Ted Robinson and Judd Mortimer Lewis—light verse about an artist's hidden creative reserves and the endless street repairs in a busy city. These are humorous observations rather than satire. **No identified political figures or cartoons** appear on this page. The content reflects early 1900s consumer culture and popular humor writing typical of Judge magazine's lighter pages, which balanced satirical content with entertainment and commercial advertisements.

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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Beeman’s Pepsin Gum The Original. All Others Are Imitations Peppermint or Wintergreen Flavor FOR SALE EVERYWHERE <<-“Vulcan” Ink Pencils ost "T®:GiantHeater ‘of gas jet (naked ¢ burner. By mail postpaid. J. L ULLRICH & CO., 27 Thames St, New York Set with an Original Baroda Diamond true archetype Genuine Diamond. Not manufactured stones, but mined like all true dia- 4 Native sivee fre and ife toits minerals more penetrating and beautiful than any devioed saree vied soa cut \n Wdoatically the same manner: have Bre sad lasting qualities youare weertag are Fes akiae ee" dauerey ane ine tenis pane tapne Clark St., Chicago, Il. COPY THIS SKETCH and let me see what yoa can do with it. You fan earn $3000 to $12h.00 or more per week, Mastrator or cartoonist, My practical system of perwonal Individual lessons by mail will develop Fifteen years gurcesstul work fot Wieket.ptete Wizard Repeating LIQUID PISTOL Will stop the most vicious dog (or man) without permanent injury. fo stamps and I will sent you a Lest lenson plate. also celloetion of drawings showing possibilitiesfor TOU, eorered Wainter . THE LANDON SCHOOL =, csies. Parker Stearas & Co.,.294 Sheffield Ave. Dept. E ct. aed BALTIMORE RYE THE RICHEST PRODUCT OF THE BEST OF MARYLAND'S FAMOUS DISTILLERIES Sold at all first-class cafés and by jobbers. WM. LANAHAN & SON, Baltimore, Md. I shall not shrink from them that think That I have nothing left to say; I'll smirk and smile and jest, the while They tear me into shreds to-day, I'll not repine, though o'er their wine They say, “‘He’s shot his bolt, poor chap!’” Though critics shout, ‘He's written out!” I shall not care a single rap. For in my heart I keep apart Some things I never yet have told; I have not sung with pen or tongue The half of what I’ve known of old. You'd be surprised if you were wised To what I hide on memory's shelf— I do not doubt, if *twere hauled out, That I should be surprised myself! Ah, no, my friend, I don’t pretend That I shall print thia hidden dope; I sing this song to prove you wrong In saying that I’m out of soap. My secret life, its loves, its strife, Its guilt, are all unprinted still; The greatest woe and joy I know I've never told. (And never will.) —Ted Robinson, in Cleveland Plain Dealer, A Busy Street I love a busy, hustling town! One day they put the paving down, All nice and smooth and swee and then Next day they tear it up again. From one end of the street back to Its other end, that’s what. they do; And then they get it smooth and flat, And give it its last loving pat. And then there is a shriek of fear Comes from the city engineer- He has mislaid his monkey wrench! And instantly they start a trench And toss the pavement all around Until that monkey wrench is found! And then they tamp the dirt in tight, And get it leveled off all right, And surface it with hard concrete, And make a street as is a street By putting sand and brick on that, And the steam roller makes it flat. Then they pierce that pavement through and through To lay a line of pipe or two! Then they repair that, and it lies Smoothly beneath the summer skies For, it may be, a day or two; Then there's a sewer to run through! Now, when some one you chance to meet Talks of the ‘‘busy city street,’’ That’s what he means, in this man’s town— The street that’s getting up and down And rolling over that way, till It just seems like it can’t lie still. —Judd Mortimer Lewis, in Houston Post. Easy To Get Along With—‘‘How are you getting along with your neighbors?” “Fine! They don’t seem to care what our children do to theirs.""—Detroit Free Press. Candor—Mrs. Huggins—Do you darn your husband’s socks? Mrs. Dashaway—No; I speak of them a little more profanely than that.—Phila- delphia Record. In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciaea. comicbooks.com