Judge, 1913-08-30 · page 15 of 24
Judge — August 30, 1913 — page 15: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* magazine (early 20th century) collects several pieces celebrating smoking and satirizing those who worry about health or morality. **Main theme**: Tobacco use as masculine independence and pleasure-seeking, mocking prudish concerns. **Key content**: - "No Smoke without Some Fire" uses Biblical quotations humorously to justify pipe smoking as ancient and wise - "I Care Not" is a poem declaring indifference to worldly troubles—wars, poverty, failing relationships—so long as one can smoke - A dialect joke about "Brudder Bulginback" working two hours and bragging eight hours - "In the Spotlight" mocks a divorcing woman prioritizing new gowns - "Reckless" tells of a man who burned his candle at both ends, lived 95 years ignoring health advice, and died—presented as darkly amusing **The satire targets**: Health reformers, moralists, and "neurotic" people worrying about smoking's effects. The magazine's position is that smoking represents carefree masculine vitality against suffocating social rules.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
No Smoke without Some Fire Old Testament Records ‘THERE is no new thing under the sun. Eccl. 1: ix. Pipe and wine are in their feasts. Is. 5: xii. Who is the wise man? Eccl. 8:i. Out of his nos- trils goeth smoke, asoutofaseething pot. Job 41:xx. The house was filled with smoke. Is. 6: iv. Weeds were wrapped about my head. Jonah 2:v A thick cloud of incense went up. Ez. 8:xi. And the house was filled with the cloud. Ez. 10:4. Your old men shall dream dreams, your young men shall see visions. Joel 2: xxviii. Former troubles are forgotten. Is. 65: xvi. As the cloud is consumed and van- isheth away. Job 7: ix. I Care Not I CARE not if my friends be true, Nor if the world with battle rings, Nor if the skies are black and blue, Nor if a bird no longer sings. Affairs of state may all go hang, The cost of living purses swipe, The busy bomb may burst with bang, So long as I may smoke my pipe. My wife may coax my bottom cent, My landlord raise my rent a peg, Cats*may indulge in merriment, For votes the ‘girls’? may pull my jeg. The world’s a spot of pleasant choice No matter what keen crime is ripe; I'll uplift no protesting voice, So long as I can smoke my pipe. A, Walter Utting. In the Smoking Room “What's in the wind? smell a rat.”” “No, it isn't a ‘rat.’ Puffer's choice Havanas."’ I fancy I It’s one of SS i NG «¢” PEAHS like, fum what he says "bout hisse’f, Brudder Bulginback am a pow’ful 'dustrious pusson?’’ “Uh-well, sah, it’s dis-uh-way wid Brudder Bulginback: He works "bout two hours endurin’ de day and putts in de yudder eight uh-braggin’ ’bout it.’” That's Where “Oh, where are the girls of yesteryear?” Sighed the sentimental mutt. “They're mending the hose of the girls of to-day,’” Answered the neurotic nut. In the Spotlight Mrs. Gramercy—I thought your divorce case was coming up this month? Mrs. Park—I had my lawyers get a postponement, because my new gowns wouldn't be finished in time. VALUES ARE One little spring costs fifteen cents at the factory. H. Fut many a drink he took And many a smoke did smoke, And he was inclined to look On the rules of health as a joke. His candle he burned at both ends, And he ate what he wanted, you know, Despite the advice of his friends, Who oftentimes bade him go slow. He took not an atom of care Of himself, but he went on his way Like one who was ready to dare The piper to call for his pay. But now he has quit it foe good, ‘And his life is a finished page; For he died, as you'd know he would— In the ninety-fifth year of his age. Walter G. Doty. One Theory If at first you're not believed, lie, lie again. RELATIVE ‘sa man who'd give a bundred dollars for it, but the factory is two hundred and fifty miles away. comicbooks.com