Judge, 1913-03-15 · page 12 of 24
Judge — March 15, 1913 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
The main illustration depicts the "Industrial Depression" as a log labeled "PROSPERITY" balanced precariously on a cliff edge, with multiple figures (representing various industries or economic sectors) perched atop it, about to tumble. The caption "STOP CROWDING!" warns against overloading the economy. The page contains several satirical jokes and humorous verses mocking contemporary life: - A list of things "NOT in Easter Fashions" offering social commentary - Anecdotes contrasting past and present (fathers recalling simpler pleasures without modern goods) - Jokes about inflation (a tiny, ugly hat costing $250) - Puns on thrift and character The overall theme critiques economic instability during what appears to be a recession period, warning that too many competing interests threaten the fragile "prosperity." The humor targets materialism, changing social values, and economic anxiety—typical Judge magazine fare blending political-economic satire with domestic humor.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
STOP Not in the Easter Fashions, ARDEN hose. Bureau drawers. Salad dressing. Cigar wrappers. Pugilists’ socks. The marriage tie. The sack of gold. The divorce suit. The coat of paint. The stock in trade. Automobile mufflers. The cloak of misery. The boot that’s given. The collar of the boss. The hem of the hesitant speaker. The clothing of thought in poesy. The hats that people talk through. The pants that come after a hard run. The whole cloth of which lies are made. . Nathan M. Levy. Diplomatic. He set his son to digging bait, And that’s the way he got The postholes quickly dug around A forty-acre lot. CcCROWODI In the Days of Pa’s Youth. Little Kendrick was making elaborate preparations to go to the zoo. “Oh, say,’’ he cried, ‘I must have a bag of lump sugar! I can have lots of fun with a bag of lump sugar and the elephants!’" “When I was your age,”’ said his fa- ther, ‘I could have a lot of fun with a bag of lump sugar without any elephants." Disproportionate. There was a fair maid with a hat; It was little and ugly and flat. But the charges were nifty— $250. Now, what do you know about that? Good Grounds. “On what grounds do you claim the title of champion thrifty man for Si Rye- lands?’ challenged Bill Dorkins, chair- man of the Loafers’ Club. “*When he comes to town he brings an ple for lunch,’? said the storekeeper, nd he always carries the core home to use for fertilizer’’ N G! How He Did It. « QVHAT'S the trouble now?"" demand- ed his employer, when the office boy came in half an hour late. “The ice on the pavements,” said the lad. ‘Every step I took, I slipped back two.’’- “You did, eh? Then how did you ever get here?” “I started back home.’” Och Ahone! There was a woman named Sadie Malone, Who loved dearly her husband’s razors to hone. To please him she failed, And loudly he wa’ “I wish to the Lord you'd let ‘em alone!” A Woman of Letters. “Mrs. Weedson has had three husbands; the first was an LL.B., the second a B.A., and the third a Ph.D." “Just plunges from one matrimonial venture into another, eh?” “On the contrary, her record proves that she prefera to be won by degrees” comicbooks.com