Judge, 1912-05-25 · page 6 of 24
Judge — May 25, 1912 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* magazine features humorous advice columns and comic vignettes typical of early 20th-century American satire. **"The Band Matches His Tie"** (top): A married couple discusses cigars a guest gave them. The joke plays on social pretense—Mrs. James diplomatically compliments unattractive cigars as "becoming," suggesting people often lie politely about unpleasant gifts. **"Heart Problems Answered by Our Own Specialist"** (main section): A mock advice column offering absurd solutions to romantic problems. The humor relies on deliberately unhelpful, ridiculous answers—telling a lovelorn man to "get another girl" or advising someone to "cut his ears off" to stop a fidgeting boyfriend. This satirizes both earnest advice columns and human relationship folly. **"In Need of Pruning"** (middle illustration): A child misunderstands his father's comment about trimming family "branches," confusing metaphorical criticism with literal tree pruning. **"A Warrior Bold"** (bottom): A brief joke contrasting two women's standards for husbands—one demands heroism; the other jokes that any hero husband "would have to be," implying even heroes couldn't tolerate her. The page satirizes courtship, marriage, and social advice culture prevalent in that era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THE BAND MATCHES HIS TIE James—"* Hamph! I don’t think much of those cigars Stubbs gave me Mrs. James—" I don't agree with you, James. I think they ‘re the most becoming cigars I ever saw you smoke." Heart Problems Answered by Our Own Specialist. Oscar—I understand the mustache is going to see a girl three times a week favorite chair and sang two songs she coming back in style. Now, I have for six years. I believe she loves me, knows I do not care for. What would never been able to raise a mustache, but — but last night she let the cat sleep inmy — you do in a ease like this? the young lady I am keep- ing company with thinks they are grand. What would you advise me to do? Ans.—Avoid all worry, Oscar. Nothing retards the growth of a mustache like worry. But if this does not aid you, get another girl. Amy G.—I am ina ter- rible state of mind and must have your advice. I have been going with a young man for two years, but he drinks heav- ily. He promised to quit, but has failed to do so. Now I want to get rid of him. How can I do so?” How can I dye an old felt hat? Ans.—Wear your old hat, Amy, and he may never come back. George—I have been IN NEED OF PRUNING. Dick—" What part of the family tree, am I, muz?"’ Mether—*' I guess you are one of the limbs, Dick.” Dick—" Do you suppose that ’s what dad meant this morning when he said that I ought to be trimmed about every so often ?"” Ans. — Increase your visits to four a week, and I think you will get re- sults very speedily. Annabelle—I aboy friend who appeals to me very much, but he insists upon wiggling his ears in church when the minister is praying. How can I cure him of this? What do you think of prunes for breakfast? Ans.—1. Cut his ears off. 2. It doesn’t make any difference what we think, Annabelle; we get them, anyway —Rebert C. MteBlvary A Warrior Bold. Plain girl—The man that marries me must be a here Pretty one—"* Well, he'd have to be."" comicbooks.com