Judge — February 3, 1912 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A Future Financier. VERY nice young man was calling A onhissister. To make things easy, he gave him a beautiful new penny, saying, ‘‘Save each penny, and soon you will have a dollar."’ ao V" re- “T'll soon have a dollar plied the boy, with great eager ness. The young man smiled good-na- turedly, dug into his pocket, say- ing, “*Well, just how much more do you need?"" “Only ninety-nine cents." He soon had a dollar. As Times Change. In days gone by, If I remember rightly, Wedancedlikethis, And, oh! so lightly! But now, when with a miss, We a® it 5% and,oh! sotightly! A Deadly Weapon. The laundry workers in New York have gone on strike. It strikes us that this is a foolish weapon for them to employ, when they have so much more effect- ive and deadly weapons within their grasp. Let us suggest that if, by previous agreement, every citizen of New York found that on a certain morning he had to put on a collar with a saw edge, the laundry owners would find themselves in the hands of an outraged and tortured mob that would fight the workers’ battle for them. Unionism could be so much more powerful if it ex- ercised more intelligence. Of all mean words we'll ever know, The meanest are, ‘‘I told you so.”” Reform Needed. Benham—'‘We need a reform in our banking system.’’ Mrs. Benham—‘‘Yes; it’s a shame that a wife can’t overdraw her husband’s account !"" THE CHOICE. Ae—"' Yes, I'm going to apply my talents; but I don’t know whether to go in for art or for poetry."” " She—** Ob, He—"" Oh, you 've heard some of my verses ?"” She—"' No; but I've seen some of your art.'’ Serious. “T would like to marry your daugh- ter, sir. I realize that this is a serious matter’;-—— “You bet itis, my son! Very serious! You may have her, and the Lord be with you!’" Not as Recommended. Unele Eben—‘*You can take this old camera back."’ Dealer—‘*What is the matter with it?” Uncle Eben—‘‘It’s a fake. You told me I could take my own pictures with it, and I’ve snapped it over fifty times and it hasn't got a pic- ture of me yet.’’ Jimpsy Tales. I—HURT TIME. When Jimpsy has the colic, Then his soul begins to Quake! It’s awful for a baby When he has a tummy- Ache! He howls like forty kittens, And he doubles up his Fists! He wants to go to mother, And he wiggles and he Twists! But when the storm is over And the peppermint is Down, He is just the nicest baby, And the merriest in Town! Lifelike. Ted—‘‘I'm going to send that old girl of mine a valentine —some- thing that depicts her in her true colors.’* Ned—‘‘From what I've seen of her, you'd better get one of those hand-painted ones.”” An Ounce of Prevention. Divorce is reprehensible, And so is alimony; Yet both can be prevented by Avoiding matrimony. The apparel oft proclaims the man— in the very loudest of tones =) THREE ZEROS IN A LINE. (Drawn with a sing's line) comicbooks.com