Judge — January 6, 1912 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Excess Baggage. V HEN Emily went out to shop A year or so ago, A tiny little leather purse She dangled to and fro. She wore a hat so wide of brim It hid her pretty face, And in her skirt a dozen yards Were pleated into place. But, lo! a brimless bonnet now Adorns her golden hair, And skirts but half a yard around Dame Fashion bids her wear; For all the stuff that made her hats And dresses once so wide Has gone into the fancy bag She carries at her side. = Minas Irving Automobile Philosophy. The enthusiastic young auto- mobile man was showing an old customer over his new garage. Presently he stopped in front of a motor-generator system, which he had recently installed for the charging of electric icles. “Oh, look!"’ he said. ‘*You must see my new charging plant!"" The customer only turned and, pointing to the desk where the bookkeeper was making out the monthly statements, dryly added, **You have a good enough ‘charg- ing plant’ there; you don’t need a new one."’ The Meagre Accompani- ment of Long Trousers. Mra. Heminglay — “That De Lancey woman is horribly cruel; she put her little boy in long trou- sers just before the holidays."’ Mrs. Gibbs—'I don’t see any- thing cruel in that.’’ Mrs. Heminglay—‘*You don't? Why, the poor child had to hang up a sock for Christmas!’’ Let Equal Rights. tated by a proposal swear to their age “over twenty-one,” their lives. ter? Men Have California is now agi- to permit women voters to as in- stead of giving the exact number of the years of Why not equal rights in this mat- There are many men who prefer to gen- eralize about their ages. “THE CALL OP THE WILD.” The Reason Why. By WILLIAM J. LAMPTON. [When women can think, speak. a why not let them vote like Sentinel.) act the equal of men, be Winchester (Ky.) That is just the men’s intention; But, brother, hear us say That women now, as women, Are quite the other way. Their thought, their speech, their actions Are so unlike the same In men that men at present Consider it a shame For women to be voters. But, brother, do not ery; The women are progressing— They'll get there by and by. The Kipling of the Species. When the muse is on vacation and the rhymes are slow to come, And the poet realizes that his best is pretty bum; When he feels that his ideas are becoming worn and stale— Then the Kipling of the species helps create a lot of mail. The rhymster write: ‘If’ or ‘*Mandal parody on On ‘Danny Deever,” ‘Gungha Din,” | “‘Screw Guns,"’ or ‘Birds of Prey"; Then sends it to an editor in hopes he'll make a sale— Thus the Kipling of the species helps create a lot of mail. Chicago a Convention City. Chicago is a city of conventions. As soon as one is held, the Chica- goan redoubles efforts to get it to come again. For several months Chicago influences have been work- ing in the endeavor to obtain for t that city the Republican and Dem- mocratic national conventions this year. Ardent as are Chicago's de- sires for these conventions, they are, however, as nothing com- pared with the work it will put in to have the next national gathering of the brewers held there. The brewers’ convention was held in the Western metropolis last year, e and not only was free beer given to the thirsty, but every drinker was told to keep the stein. So in Chicago there is a lively sense of favors to come. The Man of It. Mrs. Reed (with magazine)— “Here's a fine photograph of a | jury of California women and they appear to be paying attention to a close woman witness." Mr, Reed (slyly)— “Yes? What is she wearing?” Woman's Logic. “My dear, these are excellent cigars, but they are awfully strong!’’ “Yes; I got the strongest I could find. They won’t break so easily in your pocket.”’ comicbooks.com