Judge, 1911-09-16 · page 15 of 28
Judge — September 16, 1911 — page 15: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a humorous story by Ellis Parker Butler about child discipline, not political satire. The narrative depicts Mr. Gimp, an irritable father, discovering his son Sammy smoking cornsilk with a neighbor's boy. Rather than physically punishing the child (the "woodshed" method common in that era), Mr. Gimp employs "scientific" reasoning—a contemporary parenting theory emphasizing psychology over corporal punishment. He buys cigars and demonstrates to Sammy that adults don't smoke cornsilk, using logical persuasion instead of force. The top cartoon shows a skull-and-crossbones railroad crossing warning sign, satirizing railway safety with dark humor—a separate feature unrelated to the story below. The humor lies in the contrast between old-fashioned harsh discipline and the emerging "modern" psychological approach to child-rearing that was gaining popularity in early 20th-century America.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A SUGGESTION FOR A SIGNPOST AT THE RAILROAD CROSSINGS. HE THIRD of Au- gust, you will re- member, was a hot day, and Mr. Gimp reached his home in a testy humor. The heat of his of- fice, with the fumes of antiseptics from the hospital across the way, had given him a slight head- ache, and when he stepped inside his door he was ready to eat any one that said an annoying word. “My dear,’ said Mrs. Gimp, as soon as Mr. Gimp was in the hallway, “I must tell you about Sammy’’--— ‘What's he been doing now? What’s he been up to? Don’t stand there like a wooden Indian, Mrs. Gimp! Tell me! I say, tell me!” “i Ravana Fal = “HEY, MR. ROOSTER! WOULD YOU MIND MAK- ING A LITTLE LESS NOISE IN THE MORNING? MY DOILY 18 SUPFERING FROM INSOMNIA.” FIXING SAMMY. By ELLIS PARKER BUTLER, Author of Pgs ls Pigs.” “This afternoon,’’ said Mrs. Gimp calmly, ‘‘I happened to go into the yard, and what do you think I saw?” “That’s it!’’ said Mr. Gimp. ‘Make me guess} You can’t tell me, can you? I’ve got to guess, haven’t 1? You saw a hippopotamus. Was that it? Oh, I'll guess! You saw a red-nosed rhinoceros. You saw’’—— “I saw Sammy and that boy next dour, hid- den behind the oak tree, smoking cornsilk in a cob pipe, my dear,”’ said Mrs. Gimp. ‘‘And you know what that means, Cigarettes next. Cigars next.!’ “*Where’s that boy?’” asked Mr. Gimp angrily. “Smoking, was he? Smoking? I'l] make him smoke! I'll’. “Dearest,’’ said Mrs. Gimp, ‘‘you know how delicate he is. You won’t be rough with him?” “Rough?” said Mr. Gimp. ‘Do you mean to tell me, Mrs. Gimp, that I am ever rough? Do you mean to say I'm not consistent, Mrs. Gimp? Rough!’" “You are always very gentle, dear,’” said Mrs. Gimp, and Mr. Gimp smiled. For he had read, in various books and magazines, just how to handle the young child. He had theories, He did not take the young child into the woodshed and wallop it. That was not his way. The scientific way is the appeai to rea- son. Mr. Gimp put on his hat and went out. He went to the corner store and purchased two big, fat, oily, black cigars. Then he went home and called Sammy. LONG DISTANCE. “Sammy,”’ he said firmly but kindly, “‘your mother tells me you were smok- ing cornsilk this afternoon.’’ “Yes, sir,’’ said Sammy. and’?——— “Just so!’’ said Mr. Gimp. ‘‘Corn- silk! Did you ever see me smoke corn- silk? Did you ever see a man smoke cornsilk?"’ “No, sir," said Sammy. “Indeed, no!’’ said Mr. Gimp. “Me “We comicbooks.com