Judge, 1911-08-12 · page 8 of 24
Judge — August 12, 1911 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a humorous tourist guide satirizing New York City landmarks and the tired jokes New Yorkers perpetually make about them. Compiled by Ellis Parker Butler, it mocks both the city's famous structures and the locals' repetitive wisecracks. The page lists locations like the Flatiron Building (famous for wind gusts lifting women's skirts), the Brooklyn Bridge, and various streets, pairing each with "customary jokes"—stale punchlines New Yorkers allegedly use constantly. The humor targets New Yorkers' smugness about their city and their reliance on worn-out, predictable quips. The lower cartoon "The 1925 Review of the Regulars" (artist unclear) depicts airplanes over Washington D.C., likely satirizing military aviation developments or regulatory reviews of the era. The guide's editorial note suggests visitors should memorize these jokes to "keep pace with the witty fellows"—ironically acknowledging that New York humor is formulaic, not genuinely witty.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE'S JOKESTERS’ GUIDE TO NEW YORK. Compiled by ELLIS PARKER BUTLER, Author of “Pigs Is Pigs.” OURTEENTH STREET—This thoroughfare lies between Thirteenth Street and Fifteenth Street, with the western end aimed directly at Hoboken. It is known as ‘‘Main Street, Hoboken,’’ because on a shopping day the entire population of Hoboken may be found here. (Customary joke: ‘‘I bought a parlor suite on Fourteenth Street to- day." ‘That so? What style?” “‘Louis Fourteenth Street style.’’) The Dun Building—A large, whitish- looking building on Broadway, down- town. Can be recognized by the stout cop, with big feet, standing on this cor- ner. (Customary joke: ‘‘Dun Building, hey? Well, they needn’t be so proud because they are done building!’’) Twenty-third Street—This interesting street lies between Twenty-second Street and Twenty-fourth Street. It is eleven streets below Thirty-fourth Street. (Customary joke: ‘I get off the car here.'’ ‘‘It’s 23 for yours!’’) Aquarium—An octagonal structure, full of fish, located near the fire boat, directly in front of the red-faced man asleep on the park bench. (Customary joke: ‘‘Say, Bill, call up the aquarium EDITORIAL NoTR—Visitors to New York will find this Guide of the utmost value. By studying i carefully they will be able to keep pace with the witty fellows of the city. thas hiding the shameful fact that they are from some be nighted region. All the jokes in the Guide are time tested, and are used by all New Yorkers. on the ’phone. Mr. Fish wants you.’’) Martha Washington Hotel—A hostelry for women only. (Customary joke: It is considered excruciatingly funny to refer to this hotel as ‘‘The Hennery.’’) “(AN ILL-PAVORED THING, SIP, KUT MINE OWN.” —As You Like It. Flatiron Building—A large, tall struc- ture, built so as to scrape the wind off the sky and throw the shavings down into the street. When the wind peelings THE 1925 REVIEW OF THE REGULARS. strike the walk, they splash up, disclos- ing ankles, etc. (Customary joke: As a woman is swept rapidly down Broad- way by the gale, ‘‘How’s that for a special skirt sail?’’) The Singer Tower—A structure of Umpty-um stories, the top of which may be visited by paying a small fee. (Customary joke: Passenger enters ele- vator. ‘‘I suppose, elevator man, you have lots of ups and downs in your trade.’’) West Side of Union Square—This side of Union Square is located across the square from the east side of Union Square, in the full glare of the midsum- mer sun. (Customary joke: ‘‘Hello, old man! Is it hot enough for you?"’) Brooklyn Bridge—A large viaduct permitting Brooklyn inhabitants to reach a real city. Can be recognized by the newsboys congregated at the civi- lized end of the structure. (Customary New York joke: ‘‘Hello, boy! Got the World?” ‘Yes, sir.” ‘‘All right. Keep it and put a fence around it.’’) The Elevated Railway—An ornamen- tal arrangement for producing a loud noise in the air. (Customary joke: comicbooks.com