Judge, 1911-07-15 · page 12 of 24
Judge — July 15, 1911 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
The page opens with a four-panel cartoon about anthropomorphic bugs causing laboratory mishaps—they steal an ink dropper to prank "Professor Wisebug" and sabotage a telescope. It's simple slapstick humor with no political content. Below are three unrelated pieces: a romantic poem by Paul T. Gilbert tracing the history of kissing from Adam and Eve through famous lovers; a humorous prescription where a young doctor prescribes himself, a buggy, horse, and good road as ingredients for courting a woman; and "What If?" by Amos R. Wells, a satirical commentary on women's fashion and femininity—arguing that even if women wore identical utilitarian clothing like men, they'd still innovate and differentiate themselves, celebrating women's mysterious nature and adaptability. The "Boston Bean" cartoon depicts a man asking if his son has shoes on—gentle domestic humor.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THOSE MISCHIEVOUS BUGS. 1. Bill Bug—"* Hey, fellows, see 2. —— We'll get old Professor "1 Wisebug, —— that ink dropper? Here's a chance for some fun.— The Invention of Kisses. By PAUL T. GILBERT. Ove of our fair correspond: writes to know who N EDEN’S garden long ago, One rose-dawn of creation, When fountains plashed and birds sang low, Thrilled with a strange elation, Fair Eve stood with her red lips pursed, And Adam kissed her—kiss the first. When fauns and satyrs through the groves In reckless concourse reveled, And nymphs to limpid pools their loves Confessed, with hair disheveled— Then Venus with Adonis played, And lips seemed but for kisses made. Lovers have come and gone since these— Millions of men and misses; Proud Abelard and Eloise Thought they'd invented kisses, And Aucassin and Nicolette In some far world are kissing yet. Each kiss a throb, each throb a kiss, And ne'er a kiss re- pented; But, after all, it comes to this— es were not vented, But by sweet goddesses above Were dropped in their excess of love. in- YOUNG doctor, wishing to engage the company of a young lady for a buggy ride, sent the following pre- scription: 1 buggy, 1 horse, 1 good road, 1 doctor. Take from 3 p.m. on. THE and then’ —— GETTING THERE “ Johnnie, have you got your shoes on yet?" Ma Johnnic—" Yes, ma; all but one BOSTON ‘ BEAN''—IN THE POT AND OUT. 3. ——and tell him to take a squint through our new telescope, S.2tre?——1 What If? By AMOS R. WELLS. HAT if we hadn't women’s clothes to laugh at? What if the ladies all wore coats and derbies, And all wore trousers of the selfsame pattern, And shee formal, And looked all just alike, the way we men do? What if? minut Before the women would do something to them Poke in the derby, give ruffle, Discover new alignments for the collar, Invert the trousers and create them graceful! ron shirts and collars coldly It wouldn't be an hour, a the shirt a Because, you know, it’s not with clothes we're dealing, Not fashion plates nor fabrics nor cos- metics; But, back of all, and just the same without them, Mysterious, perplexing, Absurd, divine, kaleido- scopic Woman! While There is Life. Drummer—“ Well, I'm sorry Ican’t pay you that ten I borrowed from you last time I went on the road.”” Auto drummer— “That's all right, old man. Some one of these days I may run across you on the road, when we'll even up matters.”’ adorable, A S000 time-piece— a thirty-day note. comicbooks.com