Judge — July 8, 1911 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

EBULLITIONS. Little Helpers. The early birdie gets the worm, With lots of bugs to boot; And that is why, wise men affirm, The farmer gets the fruit. —Blue Bull. His Creditors. —She—‘‘Doesn’t it worry you dreadfully to owe so many bills you cannot pay?” | He—‘‘No; why should I worry over other people’s troubles?””—Omaha Bee. The Lesson.—School teacher—‘‘ What lesson do we learn from the busy bee?"’ Tommy Tuffnut—‘‘Not to get stung.”” —Kansas City Star. It Out,—In her hand the maiden carried a folded paper. “Ab, sheet music, eh!" observed a friend. ‘I suppose 'you are taking it home to try it on your piano."’ “No, sir,’’ replied the maid; ‘‘it’s aj recipe, and I’m taking it home to try it gram, Os Tange" Youngstown Tee") Schlitz was brewed first in a hut over sixty gram. The Feminine ‘‘Touch.'? — Wife— ite, Feminine | “Tour. — Wie—| years ago. Now our output exceeds a million Husband —"' What letter?” , barrels a year. Our agencies dot the earth. Wife—‘‘That one in your hand. It’s from a woman, I can see by the writing, and you turned pale when you saw it.” More and more people every year are demand- Husband—"'Yes. Here it is. It’s, + , iat your ‘dressmaker’s bill.’—New York ING Schlitz—Schlitz in Brown Bottles. ail. _ The Lamb's Excuse.—‘‘I'm going to! In our brewery we spend more on purity—in time—in skill— invest in °F. D. and Q." stock.’ ,, in money—than on any other cost in our brewing. Why don’t you investigate it first? “Investigate it? Why, it might go We scald every tub, keg and barrel—every pipe and pump —every t che bout | .« ‘ : n up before I find out where to ask about) tire we use it. We wash every bottle four times by machinery. Even the it!"—Toledo Blade. me : : Fi | air, in which the beer is cooled, is filtered. Coming to Them.—'‘It is said that im- petuous people have black exes." h If you knew what we know about beer, you would say ‘‘ Schlitz— “Yes; and if they don’t have them, feo ¢ ” they are apt to get them.’’—New York Schlitz in Brown Bottles. Mail. Old Jokes. @ The Editor’s Drawer of Harper's) . Magazine is an ancient and honorable | Order a case from your dealer teday. institution, True, we have heard it See that crown or cork is whispered that the jokes therein are not} “ any) always really funny, and the American branded "Schlitz, Association of Jokesmiths has even been known to suggest that they are not al- waysnew. This latter charge, however, he Beer | om we have always considered a calumny, for it was not to be supposed that Har- e griwanivediorrmammmr| Tat Made Milwaukee Famous Yet in the April number we find two = = me jokes which we remember well as having, been familiar to us in previous incarna- tions. One concerns the schoolboy who told his father that history is interest- | ing, but very sad, because everybody | r r about whom he studies has died. The e e other is about the actor and his friend who has returned to New York after an : absence of some years. Walking down The whiskey you remember. Broadway, the actor asks, ‘‘You remem- ber Grace Church, I suppose?”” and his Its fragrant bouquet, vc!vety smoothness, delicate friend replies, Tach, me sect avn |] after-taste make HARPER the pride of a good wine company was she in?” And these ap- : pear in the pages of our leading literary cellar. Leading Dealers Everywhere. monthly !—Editor Magazine. | Bernhelm Distilling Co., Incorporated Loulsvilio Every lover of @ good cocktail should call for Abbott's Bitters. Makes the best. | In answering aavertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com