Judge, 1911-07-08 · page 16 of 24
Judge — July 8, 1911 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes women's suffrage through Uncle Ashdod's tall tale about converting ten male sailors into "ladies" aboard his ship, then conducting votes on shipboard conduct. **The satire's point:** When given voting rights, the newly enfranchised women vote identically to men—they approve cursing, tobacco, and especially rum (20 for, 1 against). Uncle Ashdod expected women voters to be reform-minded temperance advocates, but they prove indistinguishable from male sailors in their vices. **The joke:** The cartoon mocks suffragists' idealistic arguments that women would elevate politics through their moral superiority. Instead, women demonstrate they're just like men—hardly the transformative force reformers promised. The caption "Progress Irresistible" drips with irony. The smaller "Expert Advice" and "A Sense Lacking" comics are unrelated domestic humor pieces common to the era's men's magazines. This reflects Judge magazine's skeptical, often hostile stance toward women's suffrage circa 1910s America.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A “TA PROGRESS IRRESISTIBLE. Exit the ‘‘ rubber-neck '' automobile. Enter the sight-seeing skimabout wore the blue Mother Hubbard, and his name was Jane’’—— “You said that,’’ said Sim Perkins sadly. “‘And maybe, if the notion strikes me, I'll say it again,’’ said Uncle Ashdod. “That’s the way I am. So I split the crew in half, and ten of ’em I made ladies out of. They looked swell, rigged up in Sarah June's spare riggin’, but they ran a leetle mite too much to whiskers. Looked like a bevy of beard- ed ladies, as you might s So, when ten was made ladies of, Sarah June she had a ma- jority ofone. There was her and ten, and me and nine."" “An’ was she pleased?” asked Sim Perkins. “She was as pleased as pie,” said Uncle Ashdod; “and she got them ten bearded ladies up in one corner and talked to ’em about reform and regeneration until the tears ran down The old-timer—"' No, indeed. Tuesday and like a pauper for the rest of the week."” their faces. ‘That’s right,’ I said. ‘I've heard a lot about this Votes for Women and I’m goin’ to give it a fair show. We'll have a vote to-morrow,’ and so we done."’ “*Was she ready ?’’ asked Sim Perkins. “*Ready be durned!"’ said Uncle Ash- dod. ‘*Votin’ time don’t wait for man nor woman. I was goin’ to try this female suffrage thing out and see wnat was in it. So we voted first on the question, ‘Shall the crew cuss as usual or not cuss?’"’ “And the ‘Not Cussers’ won?”’ asked Sim Perkins. “*Won nothi said Uncle Ashdod. “When the votes was counted, there was twenty to let things go cussin’ along as usual, and one for reform. So then we voted on ‘Shall chewin’ tobacco be al- lowed aboard of the Nancy Ann?’ And how do you think them eleven women voted?"" “I see they are goin’ to bust up the trusts,’’ said Sim Perkins. “They voted just like they was men, that’s how they voted!"’ said Uncle Ash- dod. ‘All but one, and I never could guess which one that was. I suspected the mate, but I never could make sure.”” “And I don’t care whether they bust ‘em or not,"’ said Sim Perkins vindic- tively, o next we voted on ‘Shall rum be allowed on the Nancy Ann?’ and I was mighty anxious to see how that vote EXPERT ADVICE. The novice—"* Would you advise me to give my wife a weekly allowance ?"" If you do, she ‘ll bebave like a millionaire until A SENSE LACKING. Mistress—"* Bridget, Bridget! do 1 smell gas?" Bridget—""T can't tell, mum ; it's dark down here."” would count up,"’ continued Uncle Ash- lod, *‘for I had heard a lot about what the women folks would do to rum once they got a vote. And now they hada vote, and they had a majority vote. And how do you think that vote came out?” And why should I care what happens to the trusts, anyway?" asked Sim Per- kins, ‘‘There ain't no trust that’s a personal friend of mine’’-—— “Twenty for rum and one against rum!"’ said Uncle Ashdod “That's how that vote come out! Ten of them women went and voted for rum! And that just showed me there wasn't nothin’ in this Votes for Women __ business, for that’s just how them twenty fellers would have voted if they'd all been men”—— * “Of course,"’ said Sim Perkins gently, “T wouldn't go and bust a good trust’*— “So IL went to Sarah June Spank- burst, and I says, ‘That shows!’ and she had to admit it. But just like every woman, she made comicbooks.com