Judge — May 20, 1911 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

CUPID'S ALMANAC. By OLIVER HERFORD and JOHN CECIL CLAY. poetry begin to come out. Occasional warm showers, melting hearts and bud- ding friendships. A few sharp storms followed by bright making-up weather. ‘cA Cupid's Forecast for May. MALL BIRDS will begin house-hunt- ing and set the fashion by choosing Soft airs prevail and the skies The first leaflets of spring mates, are rosy. a May Day Version. By MINNA IRVING. “MOTHER, may I go out and buy A bathing suit to-morrow? My old one shrunk away last year And vanished, to my sorrow.”’ “Yes, go and get a new one, dear, ‘Twill only cost a quarter; But don’t you ever dare, my child, To wear it in the water. a THE TWINS—GEMINI. Winter, the dotard, fooled by Apes tears, Is fain to linger in the lap of Spring, When with her tall twin brothers, May appears, And bids him have no thought of such a thing. WITHERUP’S CYCLOPEDIA OF THE MONTHS—MAY. AY IS the fifth month of the year, and is inserted between April and June as an apology for the former and a preparation for the latter. It is named after the May queens, who brave the in- fluenza on the first day of the month by going out into the wet clad in light, midsummer garments, with nothing but an imitation flower crown to protect their heads from the weather. Daughters of billionaires born between the eighth and thirteenth of May will develop a strong taste for dress at the age of sixteen, and should not be pro- posed to by clerks, born in December, on a salary of five dollars a week. Sons of plumbers whose natal day oc- curs before the nineteenth will have a lead-pipe cinch at the age of twenty-one if they decide to follow in their fathers’ profession, but should be careful of their eyes, since much staring at a hole in the floor, together with the mental strain incident upon wondering what is the matter, often brings on an astigmatism that may result in the placing of the dollar figures in the cent column of the bill. Burglars born in May, especially be- fore the thirty-first, are usually of a covetous disposition and are not gener- ally considered fit companions for the young or desirable trustees for large es- tates in which the bulk of the property is easity removable from one point to another, If you were born in May it is probable that you will succeed in large under- takings if your schemes work out right; but this is no assurance that you would make a successful undertaker. Persons born in May will, as a rule, be found to have some talent as writers and will prove successful as long as they do not give too much rein to their imag- ination; as, for instance, writing checks upon national banks where they have no account or the signing of some other person’s name on the back of a thirty- day note. A MENACE OF THE SEA. Captain Bug—"' 'Tain't any storm I dreads, but them pesky waterspouts, sez I." 15 Sweetbreads and creamy rice pudding twice a day make a very healthy diet for May-born poodle dogs, and, if possible, they should be taken every morning for a ride in the park, but only in a limous- ine, lest the chill of the morning air shall impair their health. Widows of a light and cheery disposi- tion born after the fifteenth should be most careful of themselves, especially in the presence of tall, blond young per- sons of the opposite sex, of a sympa- thetic nature and possessed of large means. It is the scientific fact that it is very difficult to get a widow of this sort successfully through her second summer. Owing to certain atmospheric condi- tions peculiar to May, inflammable young persons of either sex born in this month or out of it should avoid obedience to first and second impulses, and, if possi- ble, await the tenth or eleventh before acting, unless they are fond of travel and hope to take in the delights of a season at Reno at an early date. The birthstone of May is the emerald, but for the benefit of the young let us say that no maiden in history whose birthday comes during this month has ever yet been known to refuse a ruby or diamond engagement ring for that reason. For prevailing weather conditions in this month, see the daily forecasts from Washington. Multiply these by three, divide into halves, and subtract one-half from the other. comicbooks.com