Judge, 1911-04-29 · page 25 of 26
Judge — April 29, 1911 — page 25: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains satirical humor and advertisements typical of early 1900s Judge magazine. The main content consists of short comic anecdotes mocking contemporary social issues: **Key Satire Topics:** - **Women's suffrage**: A husband seeks divorce because his wife became a suffragette and won't stay home, noting she decorates his nightshirt with pink ribbons (suffragette colors) - **Tipping culture**: A poem criticizing the expectation to tip servants generously while traveling - **Class anxiety**: Jokes about the wealthy being "marked as legitimate prey" by service workers **Notable Anecdotes:** - A clergyman criticizing golf on Sunday; the golfer replies he "was in wretched form" - A couple without children claiming they can't afford them due to expensive automobiles - A freshman claiming to sew "wild oats" in domestic science class The advertisements—for garters, beer, whiskey, and a rupture cure—are period-typical. The humor targets middle-class anxieties about social change, particularly women's independence and economic pressures.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
HEAR» NONSENSE hteous Indignation.—“‘So you want a divorce, do you?’’ said the law- yer, peering over hia glasses at the wor- ried little man in front of him. “Yes, sir; I’ve stood just about all I can. My wife’s turned suffragette and she is never at home.’’ 4It is a pretty serious thing to break mily, you know. Don’t you think you better try to make the best of it for a while? Perhaps it is only a ing fad." 8That’s what I have been doing, but there are some things: a man can’t stand. .I don’t mind the cooking and I havin’t kicked on washing the dishes; bat I do draw the line at running pink ribbons in, my nightshirt to try to fool thé children, ’’—Success. Muriae~Through its Tonle effect, Stim- slates Healthy Circulation in the Blood Supply Noarishing the Eye and thus Promotes Eye Health, , Ballade of the Poor Tourist. Athome or in far-away climes, Wherever the tourist may stray, He\must look to his quarters and dimes To keep them from melting away. One hates to appear like a jay, So into his pocket he dips; Such scorn do the servants display For the fellow who never gives tips. The magnate, the maker of rhymes, The *‘poor devil author,’’ and they Whose money-bags jingle like chimes Are marked as legitimate prey. Have little or much as you may, The food and drink passing your lips Claim:tribate! The outlook is gray For the fellow who never gives tips. Weneed a reformer at times, Aman of true.courage, to stay Society’s foibles and crimes, And keep us from getting too gay. One needs to be brave to say ‘‘Nay’ To the porter who handles his grips, So there really is something to say For the fellow who never gives tips. ENVOY. We pikers! We grumble, but pay, Like lords, for our holiday trips, But, come, let us twine a bouquet For the fellow who never gives. tips. —Tom Daly, in Catholic Times. Sticed Oranges with adash of Abbott's Bitters are svpetizing and healthful. Sample by mail, 25 cts, {stampa C. W. Abbott & Co., Baltimore, Md. _It's a wise child that resembles its tichest relative.—Dansville Breeze. New Rupture Cure Don't Wear a Truss. Appliance” New Wonderfol. No prings or jada, ‘Air Cushions C. E. BROOKS, 5284 Brooks B ‘Mich, No Metal Touches the Skin pnghton, Garters i The New Form x of the Old Favorite Pioneer Suspender Co. Philadelphia ie 25 everywhere orby mail As Others See Us.—The dog—'‘ Funny beings these humans are. They teach their children to walk on their hind feet, just like performing dogs.’'—Pele Mele. Not at His Best.—‘‘I was surprised,"’ said Rev. Mr. Goodman sternly, ‘‘to see you playing golf last Sabbath. I should think you'd do better’’—— ‘ “Oh,’? replied Hardcase, ‘‘I usually do. I was in wretched form last Sun- day.'’—Cathoiec Times. Couldn't Afford It.—‘‘You have no children, then?!’ “Goodness, no! Living is too dear, Our last automobile cost us over five thousand dollars.’’—Chicago Post. Force of Character.—‘‘I thought your wife forbade you to marry again when she died?’" “So she did; but now I’m going to show her who is master in this house.’’ —London Opinion. Always a Big Crop.—‘‘Do they teach domestic science at your colleg in- quired the visitor of the freshman. “Only sewing,’’ replied the freshman. ‘*Good idea!’’ said the visitor. ‘And what do you sew chiefly? **Wild oats,” replied the freshman.— Red Hen, “T have sold my old typewriter."’ “You were sensible. Jinx married his."’— Washington Herald. A Hint.—Pupil (to schoolmaster)— “Sir, would you mind taking great care how you draw up my report? My parents suffer dreadfully from nerves.’’—Flie- gende Blaetter. ‘« Miss Peech,’”’ stammered the bashful young man.at the other end of the sofa, * would you—er—consider me bold if I were to—er—throw a kiss to you ?"” “Bold! "* quoth she. ‘‘I'd consider it the quintessence of laziness.”’ Old I. W. Harper Rye Its superb flavor and uniform quality have won -recognition from connoisseurs all over the world. FOUR GOLD MEDALS testify to this. These medals were awarded in New Orleans, 1885; Chicago, 1893; Paris, France, 1900, and St. Louis, 1904. When ordering whiskey, take no chances, make it HARPER. Bernhetm Distilling Co., Loulsvilic Incorporated in answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com