Judge — January 21, 1911 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“There goes that Mrs. Hifly. : It costs her as much to keep it ‘fixed’ up as it does to keep her automobile in repair."* “Well, she ought to. EQUAL COST OF UPKEEP. She thinks she has an automobile face."’ The Delights of Peace HE Carnegie Ten-million Dol- lar Peace Committee is already having its troubles and has out its sign: ‘‘This Is Our Busy Day."? Here- with are presented a few of the thou- sands of urgent letters received at head- quarters up to the time of going to press: Philadelphia, January 15th. Carnegie Peace Providers: Sirs—Let us have peace. My wife says there will be war if I don’t give her the three dollars and twenty-five cents I promised her, and I haven't got a cent. Don’t send check. Truly, “ MONKEY SHINES." By WILLIAM J. LAMPTON. Lexington, Ky., January 15th. Gentlemen: Sirs—My thirst is at war with my personal happiness, and I am broke. May I have the profound pleasure of re- ceiving fifteen cents from your fund for adrink? This will insure peace for the immediate present. Your obedient servant, Colonel A. J. C. Los Angeles, Cal., January 15th. Peace Distributing Committee: Kind sirs—My mother-in-law says she will go home and stay if I will buy her a railroad ticket. This will cost thir- teen dollars and twenty-five cents, and I have only thirty-seven cents. Don’t you think it is in accordance with the pur- pose of the fund to send me twelve dol- lars and eighty-eight cents immediately? Fraternally, Charles J. U. New York, January 15th. Men and brethren—In order to stop the war now being made on our interests by a few Vox Populiars in the —— Leg- islature, will you be good enough to for- ward to us, without delay, about one hundred and fifty thousand dollars. We know what to do with it. Peace at any price is our motto. Very truly, —— Grafters. St. Louis, January 15th. Dear sirs of the Committee on Peace —So that we may have peace in the family, will you be kind enough to send me seven dollars and fifty cents to buy a new hat for my wife? I had the money, but it got away from me ina little game at Pete's, and I have told her she should have it before Sunday. If you are mar- ried men you can feel for me and I am sure will send on the money quick. Hopefully, J.H.L. New Orleans, January 15th. Messrs, members of the Peace Fund Board: Gentlemen—Kindly consider my case as important and forward me eleven dol- lars and fifty cents due on a suit of last spring’s clothes. That insatiate tailor says he will lick me to a frazzle if I don’t come across by next Saturday, and he is bigger thanI am. In the name of peace and harmony I ask this great favor of you. Sincerely, Algie Smythe B Chicago, January 15th. Peace Committee: Gents—If you really mean business and want to promote peace, send me eight dollars to pay two weeks’ shortage on board at once, or my. landlady will make trouble. She'll trust me for the other four if she can get two. Hurry. Yours hard pressed, Henry M. J. Steubenville, O., January 15th. Gentlemen of Peace Committee—I'll never have a minute's peace at home till I buy my wife a new carpet for the parlor, and it will cost forty-two dollars. But I can get it on the installment plan by paying ten per cent. down. Please send me four dollars and twenty cents at your very earliest convenience. Yours to command, Elijah F. These are merely samples of the ur- gent peace needs of our troubled people and Mr. Carnegie should really hav: come to their relief long ago. It is now estimated that half a million a year will not go half way round, and a deficiency is already in sight. comicbooks.com