Judge — December 24, 1910 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Heroism. A woman is charged with bringing gems into this country imbedded in Gorgonzola cheese. Persons familiar with Gorgonzola cheese—and we don’t see how anybody can be—-will faintly appreciate the heroic meas- ures that customs officers are called upon to take at times in the pursuit of duty. Probably they worked in relays digging out the jewels—the asphyxiated being car- tied from the field as fast as they dropped, and fresh volunteers taking their places. But what’s the punishment that will fit a srime like that?—Cleveland Plain Dealer. The Pure Stuff. At least the snow is fresh and clean, And, when we get a lot, The Great Producer hands it out Without a rot or spot. We get it at our very doors, Delivery is free, And treatment to all customers Is white as white can be. And we may eat all we desire, In country and in town; For while the other stuff goes up, The snow keeps coming down. —New York Tribune. Interested. “What did the rhinoceros do when you tired at him?” asked the eager listener. “He just stood still and watched me run."’—Washington Star. The Worm That Had Turned. Unsuccessful angler (bitterly)—“I'm not surprised. I always thought those worms tasted rotten, myself.""—Sketch. The Way Out FROM WEAKNESS TO POWER BY FOOD ROUTE. | Getting the right start for the day’s work often means the difference between doing things in wholesome comfort or dragging along half dead all day. There’s more in the use of proper food than many people ever dream of—more’s the pity. “Three years ago I began working ina general store,’’ writes a man, ‘‘and between frequent deliveries and more frequent cus- tomers I was kept on my feet from morning till night. “Indigestion had troubled me for some time, and, in fact, my slight breakfast was taken more from habit than appetite. At first this insufficient diet was not noticed much, but at work it made me weak and hungry long before noon. “Yet a breakfast of rolls, fried foods, and coffee meant headaches, nausea, and kindred discomforts. Either way I was los- ing weight and strength, when one day a friend suggested that I breakfast.’ “So I began with some stewed fruit, Grape-Nuts and cream, a soft-boiled egg, toast, and acup of Postum. By noon I was hungry, but with a healthy, normal appe- tite. The weak, languid feeling was not there. “‘My head was clearer, nerves steadier than for months. strong, my appetite normal, my bodily power splendid, and head always clear.”” Read “‘The Road to Wellville,”’ in pack- ages. ‘*There’s a Reason.” Ever read the above letter? Anew one appears from time to time. They are genuine, true, anc full of human Interest. try a ‘Grape-Nuts | To-day my stomach is | JUDGE L’Envoi of the Christmas Shoppers. (With the customary apologies.) When earth’s last Christmas is over And the last exchange has been made, When the last duty note has been written And the very last bill has been paid, We shall rest—indeed, we shall need it!— Buy no more for an eon or two, Till a model department store’s opening Shall set us to shop anew. And she that was poor shall be happy— She shall find what she wants in a trice; She shall make a no-duplicate purchase, At a middle-aisle-counter price. She shall find all the bargains to pick from— For husband and baby and all; She shall shop from morn until midnight, And never get stung at all. And all the salespeople shall hurry, And all the transfers shall be right, And no one shall trumpet us homeward, For the store will be open all night. And each in the joy of the shopping, And each in her separate aise, Shall buy the thing as she sees it, To suit the lords of the style. —Mary Katherine Woods, in Human Life. Something To Learn. Unfortunately we do not learn the value of staying where we belong till we have wandered where we don’t.—Blue Bull. ‘The Utmost in Cigarettes” We don't count the cost when we make them. You wont when you smoke them Cork Tips or Plain ‘THOUGHTFUL FOR OTHERS. Little girl—"* Pleas2, sir, I've brought the remains of the medicine you gave grandfather. He's dead, and mother thought you might like it for somebody else !""—London Punch. Justifiable. Manager—‘‘What’s the leading lady in such a tantrum about?”’ Press agent—'‘She only got nine bouquets over the footlights to-night.’” Manager—‘‘Great Scott! enough?”’ Press agent—'‘Nope! She paid for ten." —Montreal Star. A Sure Seller. “‘What are you getting up for your Christmas number?’’ “Some great stuff!" said the magazine editor. ‘*We will have an article on pella- gra, a study of the jail system, something on the isolation of typhoid germs, and a red-blood expose of the way our axle grease is being adulterated. ’'—-Pittsburgh Post. Ain't that Mothers will find Mrs, Winslow's Soothing Syrup the best remedy for their children. 25e. a bottle. The Real Test. “Dobbins is a promising man in the com: ing campaign.’’ “Ah, but Jobbins has more chance; he't a paying one.""—Baltimore American. Pears’ “A scowling look is alto- gether unnatural.” All the features of Pears’ Soap are pleasing. A natu- rally good® soap for the complexion. Sold by the cake and in bores. In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com