Judge — December 10, 1910 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

hile Rock “The World’s Best Table Water” From America’s Most Famous Spring Waukesha, Wis. ata COS Sterilized Bottles RANG “AMBRIDGE Ses 25¢ 35 AMBASSADOR the after-dinner size Incomparable! Each a temptation for another In Cork and Plain Tipe “The Little Brown Box™ JANITORS and CUSTODIANS Send us your name and address and let us tell you how you can obtain a twenty year guaranteed gold filled Swiss movement ladies’ or gentlemen’s high grade watch absolutely free. THE TWO BOYS SOAP WORKS Indianapolis, Ind. Manufacturers of TWO BOYS OOZE SOAP od Don’t Wear a Truss won shed OF ‘Adéres—PLLPA0 LABORATORIES, Biock »»» St, Louis, Bo Maud cannot sing, recite, or dance, Paint china, write a ballad; But she can beat the chefs of France At making lettuce salad. —Detroit Free Press. She cannot sew, she cannot cook, She can’t cut out a skirt; But though she never reads a book, At bridge she is expert. —New York Mail. She cannot point a pencil end, The stone she throws will wabble; But when it comes to making good, You ought to see her hobble! —Yonkers Statesman, She cannot swim or roller skate, All that she knows is hustl And when she expects company You ought to see her bustle! —Houston Post. She cannot tie her tiny boot, She cannot deeply talk; But when it comes to looking cute, She wins out in a walk. —Spokane Spokesman. She cannot live in just the style That would fulfill her wishes; But you should hear her playing while Her mother’s washing dishes! —Chicago Record-Herald. The Foibles of Fashion. Among the Christmas novelties displayed by the haberdashers is a necktie holder which looks very much like a stirrup of regulation size. The holder is gold or sil- er plated, with the strap and buckle nicely enameled and decorated. Gazing at the display in a local store Tuesday afternoon was a man whose attire proclaimed him to be a member of the sporting fraternity. He wore a fuzzy hat, spats, and a vest that was fairly dazzling in its checks and bars. He looked admiringly at the necktie hold- ers. After learning the price, he ex- claimed, “They're a little loud, but, gee! a person might as well be dead as out of style. Gimme one of them watch fobs.’’— Youngs- town Telegram. On Christmas Morning. Johnny—‘Oh, papa, I heard Santy Claus last night. He bumped his foot a chair, and he said’’. Johnny's papa—‘There, there, Johnny! I know what he said. Run away now.’’"— Lippincott’s Magazine. A Natural Mystery. “Pa, if Methuselah was the oldest man, who was the oldest woman?"’ ‘‘Hush, my son! Not even the census man knows that.'’"—Baltimore American. Advance Information. Dr. J. M. Buckley, the well-known editor and divine, addressing a New York City Sunday school, related an incident that greatly interested the children. He told of meeting a ragged, hungry-looking little girl in the street on a wintry day, and when he questioned her she recited a pitiful tale of asick mother and younger brothers and sisters without food. After giving her a silver dollar, the good doctor followed at a safe distance to see what she would do with the money. “Now, children, what do you suppose was the first thing she bought with that dollar?’’ said Dr. Buckley. ‘*Hards up!" Up went the hands, and one child after another ventured a guess, but none proved correct. Finally a little boy, whose up- raised hand alone remained, was asked for his answer to the question. “A basket,’’ he sang out. “Correct!'"’ said the doctor. ‘‘There's a boy who thinks! Now, son, come up here on the platform and tell us why you think it was a basket.’” After considerable coaxing the boy reached the platform, but seemed unwilling to talk, ‘Go on!’’ urged the doctor. ‘‘I want these boys and girls to learn to think, The boy still hesitated, and Dr. Buckley took from his pocket a silver quarter, “T'll give you this,”’ he said, ‘if you'll tell us what makes you think the little girl bought a basket first.’’ “*Be-be-cause,’’ stammered the young- ster at last, moved by the sight of the money, ‘‘I was over in Hoboken last Sunday and heard you tell the story there."’—Har- per's Magazine. GAME OF THE RING: AMERICAN MONEY, EUROPEAN TITLES.—Pele Mele. Please Remit. Jim—*Did you ever learn anything at a correspondence school?" Tim—Oh, yes! I'm thing right now.’” Jim—"* What?” Tim—‘‘That they want some money Yonkers Statesman. learning some- His Rainy Day. “That dollar I gave you, Jame;, to save up for a rainy day, did you put it in the bank?"” “II started for the bank, sir, but it came on t> rain so hard that I was forced to go into the inn, sir.""—Boston Herald. In answering advertisements p!ease mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated.