Judge, 1910-12-10 · page 11 of 24
Judge — December 10, 1910 — page 11: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several short humorous pieces typical of Judge's satirical style: **"Different Point of View"** jokes about a fly's speed relative to Weston (likely the famous pedestrian/athlete), suggesting even insects outpace human achievement. **"Pipes of Summer"** is sentimental poetry about winter steam pipes, parodying romantic verse. **"Not According to Rule"** satirizes vaudeville conventions—a waitress correctly names food items, which the character finds shockingly unrealistic given that comedians and vaudeville performers always exaggerate or mangle such orders for laughs. **"The Invasion of Africa"** (illustrated) appears to be a political cartoon, though the specific reference is unclear from visible text. The remaining pieces—**"Scintillating,"** **"A Thin Excuse,"** **"True Economy,"** and **"Unpardonable"**—are brief joke exchanges mocking various social hypocrisies around wealth, thrift, and dishonesty. **"The Theatrical Column"** advertises a Teddy Roosevelt farce titled "My Policies," suggesting contemporary political satire of Roosevelt's administration.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
DIFFERENT POINT OF VIEW. Willie Fly—"' Talk about Weston crossing the United States m eighty days. Gee, I can do it in three seconds.”” Pipes of Summer. By DON CAMERON SHAFER. HE WILD winds blow fierce and fast, Snow drifts the house around. Hark! high above the wintry blast There comes a joyful sound. "Tis like the sigh of zephyrs warm That hint of summer biiss; A soft, sweet note above the storm— The steam pipe’s mellow hiss. Not According to Rule. That's the ever in!” Woggs most remarkable restaurant I Boggs—‘* How so? Woggs—"'l ordered ham and eggs and coffee in there just now, and what do you suppose the waitress called?”” Boggs—-‘*What?”” Woggs—‘*Ham and eggs and coffee.” Boggs—‘‘Nothing remarkable in that, is there?” Woggs—‘There isn’t, eh? According to all the comic papers and vaudeville per- formers in the country, she ought to have yelled, ‘Noah's son, actor's finish, with morning-after taste.’ "* HIS GREAT FEET OVERSHADOWED ALL OTHERS. Scintillating. ULL many a gem of bluest glass or green The big, impenctrable safes of jewelers bare; Full many a man is born to cheat unseen, And biow his gleanings on some actress THE INVASION OF AFRICA. A Thin Excuse. OU THINK it’s really shocking For her to use her stocking As a place to hide her valuables away? Tut just stop and think a minute— The poor girl wants something in it, And her money helps a little, so they say. True Economy. 66 p-yOW IS this?” we ask of our friend, who we observe is carrying a lunch basket to the office with him. ‘The higher cost of living make you stop buying your lunches at the rant?” “Not that exactly,” he says, with un- “TI do this in order to » of tipping the waiters."” usual frankn save the expe Unpardonable. Tessie—‘‘ Did she erase the price mark on the Christmas present she gave you?” Jessie—*Yes; and the cat even had the nerve to rub out the firm's name, so that I can’t exchange it!’ The Theatrical Column. U.S. THEATER. CONTINUOUS PERFORMANCE. “MY POLICIES.” THE NATION'S LIV Written, Composed, Staged, and Acted by TEDDY ROOSEVELT. Lots of Chin Music. Star, ng.” — News, D : Highly am ; “ Not a dull moment in it.” Ledger. comicbooks.com