Judge — November 19, 1910 — page 19: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE'S ALPHABET FOR BASEBALL FANS. CY YOUNG. OF THE BOSTON AMERICANS, Y 1S FOR good old Cy Young, The daddy of them all. He's won five} dred victories, ‘And still can puch great ball. He started in when we were kids, He'll be here when we're old And fans for years and years to come Will hear his history told. Sticking to It. Police Judge Simon Hahn, while address- ing a political meeting one night last week, related the following incident in reference to telling the same tale over and over again: “You all know,”’ said the judge, ‘*that the speeches made at political meetings are all very near alike, but to get something different is the proper thing nowadays. “It puts me in mind of a case of a woman who appeared before a certain mag- istrate, and when asked her age she said thirty years old. The judge looked at her and said, ‘See here, madam, weren't you here before me five years ago, and did you not tell me then that you were thirty years old?’ The woman said that was so, and the judge asked her what she meant by coming before him and telling an untruth. “The woman replied, ‘Well, you see, your honor, I'm one of those kind of women who do not believe in saying one thing once and another thing another time.’ '’—Newark Star. The Way of Servants. Subbubs—‘‘I see Blinkins has come out as a candidate for Governor.”” Townley—*Yes; he has declared his ‘great ambition to be the servant of the people.’ "’ Subbubs—‘‘Servant? What! Doesn't he mean to keep the place if he gets it?”— Catholic Times. JUDGE Elusive Fame. Fame is just like a flee 'Tis not of much avi To even try the old-time dodge Of salt upon its tail. —Jupce. | For when the strange goddess you would ‘woo, Even with much propriety, You'll often find fickle fame to be A case of notoriety. —Seranton Tribune- Republican. Matter of Necessity. A Washington woman who was visiting some friends in Philadelphia noticed that the little girl in the family was eating some new sort of cereal at breakfast. She evinced little enthusiasm for the stuff. “Don’t you like it, deari asked the visitor. “I don't think much of it,’’ replied the child. “Then why do you eat it?” The little girl paused in her task of dis- posing of the obnoxious article and re- garded her interlocutor gravely. “It's got to be eaten,’’ said she solemnly. “The grocer gives mamma a coupon for | every two packages she buys, and it’s got to be eaten every morning.””—Lippincott’s. When the Sleeper Wakes. “John!"’ she exclaimed, jabbing her el- bow into his ribs at two-seventeen a. m., “did you lock the kitchen door?”” And John, who is inner guard and was | just then dreaming over last evening's lodge meeting, sprang up in bed, made the proper sign, and responded, ‘‘Worthy Ruler, our portals are guarded!"" Oh, he hit the title right, even if he was asleep!—United Presbyterian. Not Always the Case. “Why do you say that the umbrella Bin- nick carries is unique?” “It's his.’’"—Red Hen. More Than Ever. INCREASED CAPACITY FOR MENTAL LABOR SINCE LEAVING OFF COFFEE. Many former coffee drinkers who have mental work to perform, day after day, have found a better capacity and greater endurance by using Postum instead of ordi- nary coffee. An Illinois woman writes: “I had drank coffee for about twenty ! years, and finally had what the doctor called ‘coffee heart.’ I was nervous and extremely | despondent, had little mental or physical | strength left, had kidney trouble and con- | stipation. “The first noticeable benefit derived from the change from coffee to Postum was the natural action of the kidneys and bowels. In two weeks my heart action was greatly improved and my nerves steady. | _ “Then I became less despondent, and the desire to be active again showed proof of renewed physical and mental strength. “IT am steadily gaining in physical strength and brain power. I formerly did mental work and had to give it up on ac- count of coffee, but since using Postum I | am doing hard’ mental labor with less fa- tigue than ever before.”” Read the little book, ‘‘The Road to Well- ville,” in packages. “‘There’s a Reason."” Ever read the above letter? Anew one appears from time to time. They are genuine, true, and full of human | interest. To Enjoy Thanksgiving in the good old fashioned hearty manner order a supply of Ale for the ‘Turkey dinner and see how much more enjoyment and benefit it adds to the meal, An American Holiday Requires an American Beverage The Forecast. Wife (at breakfast)—‘‘I want to do some shopping to-day, dear, if the weather is favorable. What does the paper say?” Husband—Rain, hail, thunder, lightning.""—Boston Transcript. and A Paradox. “Funny thing about love, isn’t it?”” “What's funny?” “If aman offers it she always returns it. ican. d_a girl wants it, —Baltimore Amer- A woman’s figure looks so lovely to her- self she knows it does to everybody else. WELCOMING THE GENERAL. A RAINY DAY STORY. Chapter IIT. —Meggendorfer Blaetter. In answering ativertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com