Judge, 1910-08-27 · page 9 of 20
Judge — August 27, 1910 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three satirical pieces: **"New York College of Politeness"** mocks a new institution supposedly founded by someone named Loeb, training custom-house inspectors in politeness. The satire suggests this is absurdly necessary—these workers notoriously treated the public rudely, so a "college" teaching basic courtesy to government servants is presented as laughably inadequate reform. **"Climbing Prices"** depicts a wife pestering her husband about an expensive automobile purchase ($1,200), showing how automobile ownership created new social anxieties and status-seeking among the middle class. **"Bucked into Popularity"** recounts Harry Lauder (a famous Scottish entertainer of the era) arriving in London on a skeletal horse for dramatic effect. The horse bucked him off onto the stage. Rather than being humiliated, Lauder's mishap accidentally charmed London audiences, creating his popularity through comedic accident rather than talent—poking fun at both theatrical pretension and audience taste. The cartoons satirize consumer culture, class pretension, and social climbing in early 20th-century America.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
New York College of Politeness. By MELANDBURGH WILSON. BRAND-NEW institution Is started now by Loeb The College of Po The first upon the globe. ness— The custom-house inspectors Are told to be polite Remember they are servants And handle trunks aright. They're told a life of hardship They must prepare to know, Warned not to let the ego Exaggerated grow. When after graduation The Chesterfields parade, They'll be snapped up for husbands By every knowing maid. Climbing Prices. At breakfast—"* Can't you get back from the office early this evening, dear? I want you to, Austin, so that we can take a spin in the machine. I don’t want to go out in it until I can go with you. Iam sure it is going to be a pleasant evening. Everybody in town has heard about our getting an auto, and everybody is trying to find out how much we paid, too. I know I wasn’t that way be- fore we ordered ours. But I do think you paid too much for it, Austin. Twelve hun- dred dollars is lots of money just now, be- sides the cost of running one. But since we've got it, we ought to make the most of it. . .. Anything in the paper this morn- ing? . . . You know, I am going to have some women in to tea this afternoon; but they'll be gone by the time you get back, so we can go on our spin all right.”” At tea— I’m so glad that all of you could JUDGE dred-dollar machine, should one? ... I'm crazy about the machine, though. Per- fect beauty! But, still, when one puts that much money in a car, one should get a pretty good one... Oh, I'm forgetting to pass the tea cakes! . . . When I get to talking about autos, I forget everything else."’ Bucked into Popularity. By RM, WINANS, WHEN Harry Lauder sailed some time ago on the Mauretania after a long stage run in the States, an English officer told this story of him—a story Lauder does not particularly like to have repeated. When Lauder went to London for the first time, the stage rep- utation he had made in the provinces had not made much of an impression on the metropolis. With a shrewd sense of the value of striking effects, Lauder de- cided he would arouse the Londoners to his peculiar merits in a novel manner. From some bone- yard or other he procured the most skeleton- like specimen of horseflesh he could find. On this he planned to make his first stage entrance. The old horse was tractable enough, with Lauder astride, awaiting his turn First girl—"* Look at that poor Chinese girl! she walk in those horrid shoes ?"* How can in the wings; but when the little fellow urged him forward for the grand entrance, there was a balk, a buck, and Harry was ingloriously shot to the front of the stage over the horse's head, the animal peer- ing after him with what might be THE POT CALLS THE KETTLE BLACK. Smithsonian— Mother Earth—" Ob! “ONCE MORE." termed an amused expression. Is this your correct age, madam ?"" Now guess again, little one," Lauder slow- ly and painfully rose to his feet, while the gallery applauded and stamped and cried lustily, “Do it again, Harry! Do it agai Lauder rubbed his aching back, felt cau- tiously of his bones, looked back at the horse, and, turning to the audience, he said, “ Like —— I will!” And he didn’t; but thereafter his popu- larity was assured. OME men's morals, like some women's hats, are not on straight. Second girl—"" I don't understand how people can tor- ture themselves so for the sake of appearance."* come! There's nothing I like better than to have a few friends in this way to an informal tea... . Won't you have another cup, Mrs. Millard? . . . Did you read about that child getting run over by an au- tomobile in our street? It was too bad! . . . I tell my husband, now that he has a machine, he must be very careful. He is coming back from the office early this evening to take me out fora spin. It will be our first trip together in it. I would laugh if it would break down. But, goodness kno one shouldn't have any trouble from a twenty-two-hun- MOST VALUABLE THING IN SIGHT. Fence (suspiciously) —"* What sort of swag you got in the bag ?"” Burglar—** Dat’s a champeen bulldog which was watchin’ a joiat I called at, and as he's a sight more valuable than anything I see layin’ about, I swiped him, see ?"" comicbooks.com