Judge — March 19, 1910 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE HOW DOC SEIDLITZ SMOKED. By N.B. es HAVE 8 ripe with you, neighbor? Well, I don’t care ¥ if I do; —=—— For this after-dinner smoking is just what pulls me through. Only a good plump bow! full to burn of the fragrant weed, And I am safe from the dumps occasioned by midday greed. Strangest kind of a notion, this smoking, and also strange The ways in which men use it. For instance, there was Gil Grange, Who said he wouldn’t think of it—I doubted him, for one— If his pipe didn’t call from the mantel when meals were done! And there was Mike O’Finnegan, son of the Emerald Isle. Gaze on the light of his corn-cob, face wearing a lover's smile; At length with a far-off expression, in town no happier soul, Though mayhap his lips were holding naught but an ash-filled bowl! Ganoung, of the long tongue, he kept expenses down— equaled in all our sleepy town!— ing his quid of fine-cut, and then in a blackened clay Smoking the sweetened (?) morsel in the good old-fashioned way! And there was old Uncle Billy, whose mouth—I do no sin— Made one pity the tobacco whene’er he put it in! With nim it mattered little, trudging a rickety pace, Whether the bow! was up or down protruding from his face. UNCLE HI'S REFLECTION. Hiram Hopkins—'* Gosh all gumshoes! I wonder if this kin be one o’ them air newfangled buttel rooms I heerd th’ clerk talkin’ about with ‘runnin’ water’ in it?" RIPLEY. There was also Elder Elson, who o'er the weed would gloat, Yet was heard to say with emphasis, ‘I do it for my throat.’” While Al Allen, who o’erheard him—a wag, sure as you're born, Who knew the elder liked it--said, ‘* I smoke to ease my corn!"” But, of all, Doc Seidlitz’s notions the limit were, I vow, As those who knew him closely will be ready to allow. Never tied to one pipe—no, sir!—but craving could allay With meerschaum, brierwood, corn-cob, or just a common clay. The funny thing about it was that all around the place Which Doc had made a domicile, his footsteps one could tra In office, laboratory, in hidden nooks would lie The pipes he'd smoked a little space and absently laid by. You would find ’em in the garden, in crotches of the trees; Sometimes between the leaves of books—a bookmark, if you please! And if you rummaged round in the “ pill chariot "’ he rode, 'Twould reveal a half-smoked pipe as a portion of the load. Doc took it pleasantly enough if, 'mid his care-filled days, One found his pipes and rallied him upon such lavish ways. A steaming bow] between his lips, he'd say, in accents bland, “It’s just my way; I want the weed all ready to my hand.’” And that's the truth of it, neighbor. We watch our fellow-kind, Laughing at things the people do, and think them much behind Ourselves; but every man who owns the truth will have to say, In presence of peculiar traits, ‘* Ah, well, it's just my way!”” WHAT'S THE USE STICKING TO A HABIT WHEN IT MEANS. DISCOMFORT. Old King Coffee knocks subjects out tolerably flat at times, and there is no ible doubt of what did it. A Mich- woman gives her experience: used to have liver trouble nearly all of the time and took medicine which relieved me only for a little while. Then every once in a while I would be suddenly doubled up with an awful agony in my stomach. It seemed ag though every time I took a breath I would die. No one could suffer any more and live. “Finally I got down so sick with catarrh of the stomach that I could not turn over in bed, and my stomach did not digest even milk. The doctor finally told me that if I not give up drink- ing coffee I would surely die, but I felt I could not give it up. ‘* However, Husband brought home a package of Postum and it was made strictly according todirections. It was the only thing that would stay on my stomach, and I soon got so I liked it very much. “Gradually I began to get better, and week by week gained in strength and health. Now I am in perfect condition, Don't Be Snobbish —but be particular. DRINK vans Ale IDLE THOUGHTS OF A PHILOSOPHER. D0 NOT chide your son for wanting the earth, hut rather encourage him in his desire. Only impress it firmly on his mind that he must go out and get it for himself. A mother-in-law in hand is worth two o Gres the home. This sounds foolish at first reading, but the more you k of it the more its subtle wisdom will dawn upon you, They say there is no limit to a woman's credulity, but with some women credulity ceases with the marriage of their daugh- ter, as the man who owns a mother-in- law can testify without fear of perjuring himself. and I am convinced that the whole cause of my trouble was coffee drinking, and my getting better was due to leaving off coffee and taking Postum. “A short time ago I tasted some cof- fee, and found, to my astonishment, that I did not care anything about it, I never have to take medicine any more. I hope you will use this letter for the benefit of those suffering from the poisonous effects of coffee.” little book, “The Road to in packages. ‘‘There’s a Ever read the above letter? A new one appears from time to time. They are genuine, true, and full of human interes’ Bees words of public men are spokes in their wheel of fortune. comicbooks.com