Judge — October 23, 1909 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A TRUE STORY. ONE VIEW AND ANOTHER. THE PRESIDENTIAL TOUR. HE WOMEN of the Yankee) ‘My word!" exclaimed the British] 13,000 miles of glory; | 13,000 miles of scooting; : States may think that society woman. ‘‘Here’s an announce- 13,000 miles of glee; 13,000 miles of lan they are clever at driving | ment of the marriage of another mem-| 13,000 miles of story | 18,000 miles of tooting bargains, but the claim is |ber of our nobility to an American For a waiting world to see. By the merry village band. made that in Guthrie concert-hall singer. Fancy! Isn't it : | lives a woman without a terrible?” 13,000 miles of travel; | 13,000 miles of meeting; parallel for commercial| ‘Oh, I don’t know!” replied the New 13,000 miles of meals; | 13,000 miles of screech; wit. Several months ago|York girl. ‘The average soubrette| 13,000 miles of gravel 13,000 miles of greeting; she entered a large de-|doesn’t deserve much sympathy.”— Underneath the whirling | 13,000 miles of speech! partment store in| New| Modern Society. | wheels. | —Washington Star. York City to buy a yard _ _ __ _ - of silk which the clerk told her would cost her thirty five cents. Her purchase left a remnant, of on and one-half yards. The clerk suggested that she buy the remnant. | What will you take for it?’’ asked) the Guthrie woman, “Twenty cents, madam,” replied the clerk politely. “Well, I'L take it, but you can keep the yard you've just torn off.’” ‘The clerk was staggered for a mo- ment, but, appreciating the humor of the proposal, smilingly made the ex- change. Not the least merit of this story is that it is true.—Lutheran Ob- server. | STALE NEWS. Railway guard (to man smoking)— “You can’t smoke,"* Smoker—So my friends say.’? | Railway guard—"But you mustn't | smoke." Smoker—*So my doctor says.’” Kalway guard—"Sir, you sha’ smok | oker—*So my wienayn Pench.) ad NOT BY AESOP. "Mrs. Hen, having performed her ovip- e@ arot function, took a constitutional around the yard. Returning to her nest, he found it empty and clucked angrily. ‘s the trouble, ma'am?” asked | the rooster. “It's mighty funny,’ she grumbled, | “that I can never find things where I lay them," —Boston Transcript. THE LESSON. Schoul teacher—* What lesson do we learn from the busy bee?"? atin ta Newest Income e@ Policy ool verses. You will pardon me for saying ; that they utterly lack sense, rhythm, meter, i form, construction and Ise that should be in a proud though peeved heart the t strode from the magazine office, k his verses to a popular song lisher, had them printed, and within s pnaire, came back, Vought nd fired the editor. KNEW WHAT h> WAS DOING. the American had discovered British that was better than could be produced “across ‘overy was a fine witeatone tet oie | The Prudential Insurance Company pherd, t re old Seok OF AMERICA . 1 yeuess § id the Yankee. I thou, ** said the shep- mI , _ But while the Dept. 105 Serd this coupon for full particulars and cor For $............a Month with Cash Payment at Death Incorporated as a Stock Company by the State of New Jersey ‘Address and to him the for much less JOHN F. DRYDEN HOME OFFICE: nerican had offered, ne you wouldn't sell him,” : h er had President Newark, N. J. Occupation My Age le .ceecccceseeee Beneficiary’s Age. replied the Scot; “I said I pairt wi’ him, Jock’ll be back it eter” You Need This Policy Whether You Are Now Insured or Not In writing to advertisers please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. COMIECHOOKS*cCOM