Judge, 1909-10-16 · page 14 of 16
Judge — October 16, 1909 — page 14: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* magazine contains primarily **humorous anecdotes and jokes** rather than political cartoons. The content reflects early 20th-century American humor conventions. **Main visual element:** A sketch titled "Reflected Humor" showing two men in an early automobile, illustrating a joke about penny-pinching—a passenger offers to pay twenty pounds to exit the vehicle, but the owner refuses, noting the railway gate is closed so it won't cost him anything. **Notable content:** - "FALSE ECONOMY" and "JUST AS GOOD" sections present domestic humor about miserly husbands and broken promises - "TWO HITS TO SPARE" recounts a baseball anecdote about a confused player - "TO BELINDA" is a poem with missing final words (represented by dashes), a common *Judge* format playing on readers' expectations **Advertising dominates the right column:** Blatz Beer, health products (Lair's Remedy, Santa Midy capsules), and Judge's own library offering. The page demonstrates *Judge*'s formula: light social satire about everyday situations—money, romance, misunderstandings—rather than hard political commentary.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
uae. While Rock. “‘ The World’s Best Table Water.”’ mm Hild Reautifulty bownd ant N.Y. City. REFLECTED HUMOR FALSE The passenger (to the owner) pounds to be out of this ear."* The jovial orener —* You stick to your money, old man. If the railway gates at the foot of this hill are closed, it won't cost you a cent.” Landon Sketch. ECONOMY. *Ltell you, sir, 1 would give twenty STOP! Oh, stay !"* she cried; “Stay by my side.”* Never mind, And the stay stayed. Cor-set did! *—Comie | University of Pennsylvania Punch Bowl, JUST AS GOOD. She—"Oh, George, you've your promise! The cheerful one. dearie; I'll make you anoth Cuta, broken Take Abbott's Bitters b todigestion. Wine merch Mothers will find Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup the beat remedy for their chikiren, 25e. a bottle, ore meals. A great aid nd druggists, It takes only about ten minutes to find in others the faults we can’t discover in NO MORE. ourselves in a lifetime.—N. Y. Pre. s. I played with Maude in days of yore, When bridge became her eraz But now I play with her no more She has such winning ways !—E'r. TWO HITS TO SPARE. The late Colonel Rossington, of be- loved memory, used to tell a story of a baseball game played in Topeka once between the married men and the bache- lors. A man named Flood came to the bat. The pitcher put over a straight one and Flood knocked the ball over the fence. Instead of starting for the first base, Flood braced himself and stood stock still. **Run, you idiot!" screamed the spec- tators. ‘‘Run! Why in blazes don’t you run | “Run?” calmly queried — Flood. “‘What would [ run for? I've got two more clouts at it."’—Stunfurd University Chaparral. | ANOTHER SHE! Absenteminded detective In answering advertisements please mention Junct. MANUSCRIPTS “EAST AND WEST.” Declined with thanks. turned herewith, MSS. _re- Te orshipful and highly 1 of ten million ancestors, sting and prostrations, The micro- ¢ carth-sprawling worm in whose js the guidance of this despicable is confided by the too uthority gro ius, and clothing of your supremely The miserable ¢ honoring of his ificant ink smear by your lord- vhip’s offer, and, kowtowing at your) monumental ¢ gra restores to your springlike the writing. He wh august publication of your thoughts, born in a moment, to live| eternally, ix beyond his powers, and re- stores that which his eyes may not read be unblinded, and which his. purse t purchase, more precious than the Emperor's ing of the foreign d FAR WI If you are the cowardly skunk what d poetry like th cioak of ** Poeta in at our back window at e when we ain't looking, iged by your calling here to tote yeof rubbish away; failing ‘which, we will rip the hide from your leprous frame and send an edition of books of your ravings bound in it to your widder. inspired ficent_ thoughts Silas T. Toots, Editor Blidso Bugle, WW. SNEDION, TO BELINDA. | Belinda is the village belle, Her beauty has no |). Her charming manner is perfection, There's no one like her in this §. 1 wonder would she think me rash If after her I made a —, And with a manner suave and bland | I frankly asked her for her tay"? | Then if I murmured, “* Tell me, deari Would she say “*Yes,"” unto my ? | And yet—Belinda’s tongue’s so brisk, I fenr I'd be an *. —Carolyn Wells in Harper's Weekly. A COLD PROPOSAL. | North Pole (to Cook)—"This is so! sudden."* | Cook (to the pleasure is mine. North —Life. THE DIFFERENCE. ‘lw Pole)—‘The Me bette s Iw to admit it. RLOCK HOLMES. “Speak up, please! —London Punch. It will be appreciated. The Voice of Reason “Drink it for “f Health and Contentment” Quality and Character Remember The A Label LAIZ Order a case sent home Ask for It at the Club, Cate or Buffet Instat on“'Biatz.”” VAL. BLATZ BREWING CO., MILWAUKEF EVERY WOMAN] is interested and should know about the w ee MARVEL WHIRLING SPRAY Ask your drug- gist for it. If he cannot sup. ply the MARVEL, accept noother, butsend stamp for illustrated book—sealed. It gives full particulars’ and directions invaluable to ladies. Address MARVEL CO., 44 East 234 Street, New York SANTA CAPSULES LAIR'S PILLS} 7 SAFE. & . EFFECTIVE S0c&S!| wit wet Mee Every ROMEIK'! GET A COPY OF JUDGE’S LIBRARY LOC. neveiZarer LOC.