Judge, 1909-08-07 · page 4 of 16
Judge — August 7, 1909 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several distinct satirical pieces: **"Judge's Favorite: Flora"** - A portrait praising an attractive woman as "The Motor Girl," celebrating early automotive culture. **"The Inhabitants of Mars"** - A speculative essay mocking contemporary theories about Martian life, with illustrations of imaginative creatures. The satire targets pseudoscientific claims popular in the era. **"Hard to Arrange"** and **"The Summer Girl"** - Brief domestic humor pieces about courtship and marriage, typical of Judge's social commentary. **"A Good Alarm Clock"** - A one-liner joke about marital life. **"A Smart Boy Wanted"** - A cartoon depicting an employment notice, satirizing labor-seeking youth and working-class aspirations through visual humor. The page represents Judge's typical mix of social satire, domestic comedy, and visual gags targeting turn-of-century American culture and relationships.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE'S FAVORITE FLORA CROSKIE, IN “THE MOTOR GIRL." So charming and neat! It's really a treat The price to pay Vo see you play THE INHABITANTS OF MARS. IT HAS again been discovered that Mars is inhabited, but by what deponent saith not. It is rather important that we should be enlightened on this point ere we decide to there for the summer, planet is inhabited by fr al to + would or he to believe that intellectual stimulus, On the ws with lively rease any part other hand, if, as son imagination seem to think, the inhabitants of mechanical build, it would without taking an expert per of Mara are hardly be safe along with us some on knowledge of how to handle aut to yo there with neing in and f the con- ter of kittenish au #¢ the tr nd comfort of other out ann 4 reygardles brand- of puppies; nor would o likely to b nthe towy improved by a sudde th with an object ¢ thly exp Hey's weird figure of Frank in, if Mars has people, What kind of people are th fit to print in. the i columns of aper, for instance plunge into th . we should know somethi cial atimosphe uae the Blue Book, and M. Flammarion should do something to secure for us the Martian Burke, or “* Who's Who along the Ca- nals,"’ before he seeks to introduce these persons to us. Is there a chapter of the Sons and Daughters of the American Revolution there? Is the Order of the Cincinnati represented in its social circles? Is there Hohenzollern, Guelph, or Romanoff blood in the Mar- tian veins? Have they a Biddle or two, or an Adams, or, perchance, some scion of America’s proudest families of the South? Or, even among the newer, spicker aristocracy, have they any Rockernegies, John W. Gateses, or Cyrus Q. McBoodles? Let us know about these things, Brother Flammarion, ere you ask us toinvest in any of your ut Mars- ville-o Itis not a place habited —we must know by w Ant-hills inhabited, but they fora are provide poor comy siest summer < SUMMER GIRI Bat now non tents her Dan Cupid helps Hor with a noon, HARD TO ARRANG THE UT a year bok informed her And te her aid Dan Cupid went Armed with a simple dart atlinge senuinely sorry ut further word of le ‘The other day the arried, The mistress assed, however, wit are you to be married, Nora in’ it’s niver at all, I'll be thinkin’, mum," was the sad reply. What is the trouble? Really? I won't marry Mike when he's drunk, an’ when he's sober he won't “Tis this, mum, marry me!"" A GOOD ALARM CLOCK, “*Why don't you have Bridget shut the kitehen do 2 One can smell the Husband breakfast cooking all Wife—"* We leav ver the house, it open on purpose, The smell is all that gets the family up." Hotpinc hands too long is as dangerous in love as it is in poker. INHERITED MOTTO—No. 1 10 business to sell goods while I work up trade on the outside.” ce in der cloding peesness mid mine fadder.””