Judge — June 5, 1909 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

$e) eS » World's Best fi Bitters Braces the whole system and ban- ishes the | r ills. Best of tonics. yichere. LUYTIES BROTHERS, U.S. Agents, Now York. THE RETORT COURTEOUS. An old darky wanted to join a fashion- able city church, and the minister, know- ing it was hardly the thing to do and not wanting to hurt his feelings, told him to go home and pray over it. Ina few days the darky came back. Well, what do you think of it by this * asked the preacher. 1, sah,’’ replied the colored man, “Ah prayed an’ pra: an’ de good Lawd he says to me, ‘’Rastus, Ah wouldn't bodder mah haid about dat no mo’. Ah've been trying to git into dat chu’ch mahself for de las’ twenty yeahs and Ah ain't done had no luck.’ "— Christian Register. MORE TROUBLE. | “How I wish I had been born a man! Women have all the troubles in this world Hubby—"1 don't agree with you, my dear, ‘They don’t have wives!""—"1) Independent, NOT JUST THE ORDINARY KIND The Whittier Inn Sea Gate, New York Harbor On the Ocean and near the City Located ia & Beastifel Residential Private Park OPEN ALL THE YEAR | aon, “Boulet a, | EARLINGTON | 55 West 27th Street |! 3 AGARS “MADE AT KEY WEST J! you talking yet or again 2” "— ‘rele. | to one! Reflected Humor THE OLD-FASHIONED BONNET. How dear to my heart is the old-fashioned bonnet, The old-fashioned bonnet that Nell used to wear; Without any plums and red cherries stuck on it— The bonnet that didn’t require phony hair. The dishpan effect may be stylish and stunnin, The wast paper basket that’s lately come in May be quite the rage and recherché and cunning, But give me the hat she tied under her chin. —Detroit Free Press, MONEY WELL SPENT. “I suppose to educate your daughter in music costs a great deal of money?” “Yes; but she's brought it all back for m ; I'd been trying to buy out my next-door’ nal ighbor at half price for rs, and could never bring him to terins until she came home !""—Fliegende Blaetter, ktail should insist that making it; insures your | Every lover of a Abbott's Bitters be ketting the very beat HARRY LAUDER TELLS OF HIS | AMERICAN EXPERIENCES. ‘The voyage across was uneventful, | and in some hours leas than fi after leaving Liverpool we we | York harbor. A number of my n | enthusiastic admirers in New York hired a little steamer and had come down | the river tosalute me. They had rigged up a small gun on their craft, and. they dit every other minute with great) to, ut the same time raising cheer | cheer for myself. 1 really felt ortant, and waved back my to the occupants of the launch. On the quay un enormous crowd was nbled. 1 was hoping that they waiting for some other person than myself, but, alas, there was no Even the customs offi- faces as large “otch bannocks. Say: me, You'll in your trunks, | have nothing * special “only a sang or| but T expect you'll for singing them. I laughingly answered that 1 would charge ax much as I possibly could. Then my little party drove off to the Hotel Astor. Drove, did I say? It was more a crawl than a drive, for a purty of Highland pipers led the way, skirli as lustily as ever they could. streets were lined on every hand, and 1 very nearly caught the cold on my bald spot through having to take off my cap 80 much.—Harry Lauder in London Tit Bits, QUITE A SHOCK. Bridegroom (expectantly)—'Now, my dear father-in-law, 1 wish to say just a word about my debts" Father-in-law (slapping him on the back)——""Did you say debts? Why, my boy, I'll bet my debts excced yours three | "*_Fliegende Blaetter. PREFACE OR APPENDIX. pr ent insurance man in San Francisco tells the following : “A man went to sleep in the midst of acurtain lecture. When he woke up in the morning the words were flying as fast as when he went to sl “ Say,’ he in- terrupted the harangue to inquire, ‘are Epresnoeneemrnessssseremesnererrenne 95 (hp h444444664646664646464464646604644646464646460646 six easy—what? erally waiting for ~ The v VAL. BLATZ BREWING CO., MILWAUKEE, WIS. PPPPPPPPPPEPPEPPEPEPE POPPE POPPER EEEEEEED IN THE ENJOYMENT of all the season's sports — Bat and Ball, Boat and Oar, Sprinting and Track-racing, The Chase, The Race Course, Riding, Swimming, Bathing, (x) HUNTER Bs) BALTIMORE RYE contributes Delight, Cheer, Comfort and Strength. The best stimulant for emergencies and the most perfect and purest whiskey for health and recuperation. 1 44464444644464444644664464644 46440444 aaa’ Hold at all first-class cafes and by wae Lbers, LANAMAN & SON, Ualuware, Md. ry a ry ry A ioe “Only one more load, old boy! Do it in Borrower (meeting owner of car)— Landon Punch. ine al time Il times. BIAIZ You can tell a Blatz Bottle a block The achievement in brewing ritable fulfillment of one notable beer character, quality and Iways the same vod Old Blatz Cafe or Buffet. jatz.”” healthfulne Ask for It at the Club, Insist on “‘ Correspondence Invited direct. Write the Val. Blatz Brewing Co., mentioning this paper, for thels interesting booklet entitied “A Genial Philosopher.” comicbooks.com