Judge — April 24, 1909 — page 9: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HEARD AT THE ALASKA-YUKON-PACIFIC EXPOSITION. Hi (counting up his remaining surplus)—"* By gum! I know now why they call this Midway A FOOLISH MAN. HERE was a man in our town, He wasn't very wise; He tried to cure insomnia By eating mincemeat pies. I mean. His manner at] times—well, I am sure you needn't get so indig- nant about it, dear! No one could be fonder of poor, dear Harry than! COpeee DOESN'T HURT ME" am, I only wanted to/ keep you from making | THAT ARE TOLD. a fatal mistake. | # * What's that? Both Believe that coffee was hurting me,’ | - says a New York woman. ‘You just his father and mother couldn't convince me its use was con- were only children, and nected with the heart and stomach trou- he had neither uncles ble I suffered from most of the time. nor aunts? Why, how, “My trouble finally got go bad 1 had| to live on milk and toast almost entirely | very odd! I never heard of any one who hadn't any—oh, 1 for three or four years. Still I loved am sure you are wrong, dear! Icouldn’thave been mistaken! the coffee and wouldn't believe it could What did you say? You think it would be a very inhuman |do such damage. ; father who would chase a six-months-old baby all over the| “’ What I needed was to quit coffee | house with a hunting knife? Why, what can you possibly 2% take nourishment in such form as | jouse with a hunting knife? Ys you possibly | my stomach could digest. mean? His father died when Harry a baby? Ob, 1] Thad read much about Postum, but know you are wrong, dear! I don’t see how I cowld—You | never thought it would fit my case, until can prove it? Well, ally, you seem remarkably well in- | one day I decided to quit coffee and give formed on Harry's family! 1 think your defense most| it 9 trial and make sure about it. So 1 ee on ey sake jee . | got a package and carefully followed the unbecoming, since you say you are not engaged. directions. “You are sorry Belle feels so badly about it? Idon't ‘Soon 1 began to understand you at all. I'am afraid, dear, you are growing able to eat carefully s ° spiteful. Nothing detracts from a woman more than a lack Ut the aid of pepsin or other digestants, 9 and it was not long before I was really of charity to others, a new woman physically, “* Well, J must go. As you know, William and I areas; ‘* Now I am healthy and sound, can devoted as we ever were. I can never stay away from him eat anything and everything that comes long. I am always uncasy until I see him again. plone ey aa ate Gunes i ; quit coffee an Good-by, dear. I am xo glad 1 was mistaken about yt the nourishment I'nveded. through poor, dear Harry!" panuana stam. | this delicious Postum. “My wonder is why every one don’t HER LONG SUIT. | give up the old coffee and the troubles Ral that go with it, and build themselves up, 66 JIBS: PROMOTER informs me that you and T are to gy] Rava done, with Postuns.” i be partners in the whist game at her card party, Easy to prove by 10 days’ trial of to-night,"” imparted the major, meeting the clever Postum in place of coffee, The reward Mrs. Flurry on the avenue, “I didn’t know you played i whist.”” “Oh, I play a little, major. It's a beautiful day, isn’t. Feet roan me amove it?” | genuine, true, and fu “Yes, Now let me give you a pointer,” rejoined | the major, who was as carnest in his whist playing as he PROSE vs. POETRY. was redoubtable, ‘In the game to-night, if you have long) ‘The sentimental girl—*April is my suit, use it.’ favorite month. I wish it would last “Very well, major, I shall. There goes Mrs. Skittle, forever!” whom I want to see! Good-by, major; I'll see you at the| The practical man—"Same here. 1 whist game, and I'll wear my long suit!"’ have a note coming due the Ist of May." TAL ** 1 was one of the kind who wouldn't Re There’s a Reason."” read the above letter? Anew one je. They are man interest. The Pay Streak.’"* GONE, BUT NOT FORGOTTEN. HE PORTLY old gentleman had just finished a sumptuous repast. Lighting a huge Havana, he arose to go. “ Haven't you forgotten something,” began the waiter, in an insinuating manner. “Why, so I have!" was the reply. “I declare, my memory becomes more treacherous every day!" Lifting the ash tray, he pocketed the dollar bill lying beneath it, and calmly strode out past the crestfallen knight of the tray. MY SWEETHEART LU. SAW a pretty maid named Lu, A-paddling down the stream. She made such clever eyes at me, I thought her just a dream. 'Twas then I felt my heart was rent— Aye,riven through and through! ‘Twas then it went down to defeat—— She was my Water Lu! ice of bald- t physician, of improv: ing the general hand vigor, while at the same time keeping the scalp and hair in a clean, well - ventilated _condit accomp! these last essentials IN THE PREVENTION OF PREMATURE BALDNESS no procedure is so uniformly geatify- ing’ and toccesaful, or 40. ‘closely meets the teachings of moder hy- giene, as systematic shampooing with PACKER’S TAR SOAP ‘The surest indication of the healthful benefits which follow the use of this pure, bland, and mildly antiseptic soap is found in its universal employ- ment. Our booklet of practical in- formation, “How to Care for the Hair and Scalp,” dress, The Packer Mfg. Co. No, 81 Fulton St., New York, comicbooks.com