Judge, 1909-03-20 · page 5 of 16
Judge — March 20, 1909 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains mixed content: a poem titled "A Psalm of Knife (and Fork)" celebrating meat-eating and carving skills as art, followed by humor and illustrated stories. **"The Sweethearts of Second Childhood"** shows wealthy or upper-class people dining, likely satirizing affected dining manners or romance among the aged. **"The Yarns of Captain Fibb"** is a comic strip featuring a seafaring character and an octopus. The narrative appears to involve tall tales and exaggerated maritime adventures, with Captain Fibb spinning implausible stories to listeners. The humor derives from obvious fabrications and the octopus's involvement in absurd scenarios. **"Market Advice"** provides investment guidance, likely satirizing stock market speculation or financial tips. The overall tone reflects Judge's typical satirical approach to contemporary American social pretensions and leisure-class behaviors.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A PSALM OF KNIFE (AND FORK). CES ELL, me not in mournful numbers There is nothing fit to eat; While there’s cabbages and cucumbers We can well dispense with meat. Life is real; meals are earnest Better start them all with fruit Was but spoken of the brute Not in stufling, not in starving, Is our dest THE SWEETHEARTS OF SECOND CHILDHOOD, Only he knows how MARKET ADVICE. THE speculator will carefully observe the following (good any day), he not possibly lose : Sell on bulges. Buy on sags. Acquire only cheap stocks. Let us then be up a With a taste fi TWO TURNS. id the mistre: turn the fla si “ M*"*. new se Get rid of dear stocks, ES Take ts. is ‘ou atd ad <a ner geurnp F Mary; you didn’t break “74 Cut “4 to the minimum, Stop! | eyo e “ . ii * Stop! why are you turning them iiie s wurst” Is YET TO Find out exactly what a stock is going over again COME, to do before operating. “They say one good turn deserves another, Don't play, mum!" rasan 0, somrs, ‘THE YARNS OF CAPTAIN FIBB. T have a gay old ¢ and Spike Spike Marl wa sudden a critter fishes a bottle 0° boaze from ime pocket and a pipe full 0° "baccy outer Spike's. = 7 nes Fas ance 4, —— Whew! wuz an excitin’ — By and by the hooze gets the best 0° That thing us around like we we ties allthe dem less. vat all—and gettin’ a worse jay all ats. . , comicbooks.com