Judge, 1909-02-20 · page 3 of 16
Judge — February 20, 1909 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several satirical pieces targeting early 20th-century social issues: **"The Policeman"** mocks a sleeping officer neglecting duty while supposedly patrolling a wealthy neighborhood. The satire suggests police corruption or incompetence—the officer dreams of being a "Sergeant" while shirking actual work. **"A Mean Landlord"** depicts landlord-tenant conflict, with a landlord refusing to maintain properties while extracting high rent. **"Engagement Rings"** and **"The Rarebit Fiend"** appear to be lighter social commentary on marriage and relationships. The page also includes **miscellaneous quotations** critiquing Congress, the political system, and Tom Lawson (likely referencing contemporary reform debates). **"The Modern Version"** parodies "Mother Hubbard," updating the nursery rhyme to satirize trusts controlling consumer goods. Overall, the page reflects Progressive-era criticism of institutional corruption, labor exploitation, and monopolistic business practices.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
STREET PRIMER. THE POLICE! VER SE he Pe 0; where is He He is in the Dark Doorway where the wind doesn’t Blow. Is He watching the Rich Man’s house | opposite ? Yes, He would be if He were Awa | but just now He is dreaming that He is a Sergeant, sitting in a warm Office slinging out Orders to His in § mouth tw: Every that is an Order. eman be on His a match and see F time His mouth twitehe | Shouldn't the Pol | beat? He is on His beat now; He is beating the Firm He is working for. Come away and do not disturb Him, He is tired. He chased a Man two blocks yesterday and Lost him. ‘That is why the Policeman is Tieed. Isn't the Policeman in Danger of losing His Job ? tion is also As ary and infectious.) son, cans rgeant at the ting ix both hered| A MEAN LANDLORD. ENGAGEMENT RINGS. Mes, Uptawn (to lady caller)—" L do think we "ve + meanest, most pe- hylock of a landlord th then? Why not try some other place if nyg old § THE RAREBIT FIEND. nurious and ‘uller—" Why do you you don't like the landlord ? Mrs. Uptown That's just it! He's that mean he won't let us get far yject to us to move."* main here ft us in their prime) is a furlough to snoozing tim That the s When it cor enough behind with the rent so it is really any « pot in mournful numbers ty dream; Tell me MISCELLANEOUS MISQUOTATIONS. 66 THERE is a divinity that Hu T Re house it as we wil “4 our ends, New York State Politician, al and life is cending, sun f ju soon Will ascer' lost whose low, 2 nd_no fellow-mortal done,” Ne Cepeene eneAty Titeiniiiy. Full of woe and full of pain, “There is no terror, Teddy, in your threats."* ungrens, You will soon be up, pursuing, — . With a heart for any fa 's blows in Congress's halls Ch 1 oblins--exg-eyed serpents Resounded merrile : alled to life by what you ate, tune on Teddy's Stick . 1 the Bigg Stick fh Do not harbor midnight rarebits Unete Joe. Friends will call and cannot save, “A hearse! A hearse! My kingdom for a hears a retort ge gla aa Woilicttbpis ‘ootprints on your new-ms ' * An oil well, wheresoe'er it be, A source of dollars is tom And it is nothing mor hn De the System, let the System) be And let the man who denounces be Tom Lawson; And in his denouncing let him nothing. call Kut thieves, thieves, t Oh, for my remedy!" Tom Lawsin, * So live that when your term of office ends, And must nth’ ex-Pre nts— So live, at you ean hand, your job Down to whatso sucecaxor you may ch And th hunt the lien in the hi Of darkest Afries. Or, if you will, + Go edit mayeaz What The while you hold th . Do't sot an pl Hi A slashin shinge, rood old corkinge ti diy te | THE MODERN VERSION. | ILD Mother Hubbard, he went te the cupboard, | nee dog a crust; | | . } cupboard controlled by a Trust DID AS THEY WERE INSTRUCTED. pS Mr. Klank “Is your sister in, Johnny : see ry Johuny—* Ave you Mr. Jones J 66THE DRINKS are on me,” said the passer-by, ee eet ts UNSaK then sh Johnny as the brewery wagon upset on comicbooks.com