Judge — January 16, 1909 — page 3: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

—~e— ADVICE FOR TAFT. OW, SIR, that you are elected, all cf us, N whether we supported you or not, feel free togive you advice, Here is somewhich is of- fered for what it is worth without impertinence: Be wise. In other words, do not do any- thing which is unwise. Be just. This ought to be easy, as you were formerly a judge. Be kind. any particular ki old kind, It w appreciated, Be impartial. Treatall sible. If it is not possible, y it by denying the exi . Be safe and ud thing to be for either a Demoe . except in campaign time. The alternative is unsaf and insane, Take your choice. Be careful, That is what we te children, ai achild so far as the presidency is concerned, If you 4 ful, you will be not 4, but any © if pos- tout of c tence of cl That isa ch all our reless, you 8 Bring prosperity. ‘This is desired without a dissenting voice, and besides, you know, you promised it. But, if you pl perity which doesn’t cost too much to partak: Be a good Pre ent. All the other ad: y to this. If you do not know how to Almost is secon be a good President, ask some or any one can tell you. PLLIS 0, JONES, Fs apt “KNOCKS KNOX,” SHE NAMED HIM. SIAH HORSEFLY smiled kno in the crowd in front of the fortun with one hand on his silver watch, “She'll tell you your past—she'll tell you your future—she'll even tell. you your nam roared the barker through his mega Bet a squash she can’t do it!’ muttered gly ashe stood eller's booth, hone. He “t tell you your name she'll refund your mon yelled the barker, as he sized up Hezekiah and seemed to know what was passing in his mind. ** By hen, I'll do it!” exclaimed the man from Podunk. ‘I'll hev some fun fur nothin'!"" and a moment later he had paid two dollars in advance and was sitting face to face with Madam Tabasco, “the famous gypsy queen."” “You are going on a long journey,’’ she began, as she studied his hand. “Yep; that’s what they all say,"’ sneered Hezekiah, ‘Go on and tell me my name or gimme my money back.”” “A blond lady, whom you have never seen, has fallen madly in love with you, and ’* “1 don't keer a punkin seed if she h “I'm here to be told my name." “But I warn you to beware of a short, fat man,"’ continued the fortune-teller. ‘* He will’™ And Idon’t keer a bumble bee about a short, fi in Hezekiah, ‘* 1 want my name, or there'll around here. You know you "t tell it “You would have me tell you your name?" she asked. “That’s what I'm here fur, grandma,” he flippantly replied. “Very well, sir. But first let me tell you your future; let me give you a warning that will be worth fifty times the small sum you have paid. A dark man will soon cross your path, and if you'’—— “*L kin take keer of all the dark men that cross my path. I'll give you a minit more to tell me my name."" “* Very well, sir,"’ said Madam Tabasco, as she touched a bell and a smile came over her face. ‘* Your name is ‘ Sucker.'"’ And after Hezekiah Horsefly had been hustled out by the bouncer, he agreed that the fortune-teller had hit the nail on the head. a he broke in angrily. man!"" ex- sum trouble wis. A PITTSBURGH Appropriate designs for San Francisco and other SHION PIL. comicbooks.com