Judge, 1909-01-09 · page 5 of 16
Judge — January 9, 1909 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three separate satirical pieces from an early 20th-century American humor magazine: **"A Born Financier"** mocks a life insurance agent pressuring a reluctant client with increasingly absurd sales pitches—from basic coverage to opera tickets and dinners—suggesting aggressive insurance marketing tactics of the era. **"But Not the Interim"** depicts a book agent deceiving a potential customer with smooth talk about purchasing a composition, hinting at door-to-door sales fraud. **"Well Stocked"** shows a sick woman (Lisa Jane Johnson) complaining of ailments while her husband dismisses her concerns, satirizing both hypochondria and marital dismissiveness. The short stories and additional sketches continue this theme of everyday social satire—poking fun at contemporary consumer culture, domestic relations, and human foibles rather than specific political events.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
OVERHEARD IN THE SCHOOLROOM Teacher (studying about fowlsy—* Mary, what is an ¢; rf Mary—" i egg is a chicken not yet.” A BORN FINANCIER. 66 QONNY,” began the book agent, S “would this be a good time to see the boss?" “Got: yer life insured?" queried the office-boy. “Now, look here, old man," continued the fellow, in confidential tones, ** you and I must fix this little matter up. Your busi- ness is to keep us fellows out of the office, isn’t it?” “ Dat's right.” “At the same time, you need a little extra coin for balls and parties and Delmon- ico dinners?” “To say nuttin’ of grand opera." “Of course. Now, old pal, I'll tell you what we'll do, You getan in for me with the head of the firm, and I'll hand you half a doliar before I leave. Why, I've got a book nroposition here that he'll jump at.” * Nuttin’ doin’, replied the boy, after a few moments’ thought. “But why not?" “ Becus a guy as smooth as you would “Liza Jane gested circulation Mose Johnion—* Umph ! ain't dat enutf ?* WELL STOCKED. Mose Jol nson—* I feels terrible sick, "Liza Jane."* nson—"* Huh! nuffin thah mattah wiv yo’ dat physician says, ‘ceptin’ chronic indolence and con- BUT NC , little man? sell our easy boxs so many books he'd be broke for months, an’ I'd lose a dollar a week in tips he hands me. It’s your move, Algernon."* And the book agent sighed and moved on. ALB, Lewis, SHORT STORIES. ITTLE girl, Box of paints; Sucked the brush, Joined the saints. A NOISY YOUNGSTER. Uppaon—'* You have a new baby at your house, I hear.” Downing—" Great guns! and we live four miles apart! I had no idea any ore could hear him that distance!" SQUELCHED. 5 she cried, on in blank y tor poked spair. He's sorry now he chanced to note The other woman's pretty hair. comicbooks.com