Judge — December 26, 1908 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

~~ HUNTER BALTIMORE RYE A PURE REFINED TONIC ANO HEALTHFUL STIMU- LANT GIVES A CHARM TO. HOSPITALITY Soltat all rstelasecaten and by Jobhere, WA. LANATIAN & BON, Haltimore, 3d. HEAD DRINKING K’S Swheae. CHAMPAGNE Because i juice of luscious grapes. Millions of made from the pure People find their tastes embodied in the delicious flavor and bouquet of this one perfect vintage. Sold Everywhere. A Rare Book of Humor Is a bound volume of JUDGE. The best binder on the market is the one we are sending our sub- teribers for $1.25. This amount includes all charges for postage, ete, Address THE JUDGE CO. 225 Filth Avenue New York STORIES ABOUT PEOPLE “*Teannot tell how Tsay the tale as FITTING FACT TO THEORY. Booker T. Washington, one of the best-educated negroes in the United States, spoke at the International Con- gress of Religious Liberty in Boston, | In speaking somewhat impatiently of a) new theory for the solution of the race question, he said, | “It's work we want, not sniecites: | There are enough theories, in all con- science; but of workers, on the other hand, there is always a dearth.” The eloquent colored man paused and frowned. “*When I hear of a new theory,’’ he said, ‘‘I am reminded of the two geolo- | gists. At acertain summer resort, one brilliant afternoon, the younger geolo- gist, from his bedroom window, saw the | older man rolling a great rock down the side of a mountain. “He watched the work for nearly three hours. The old geologist, thin and little and white-whiskered, had a hard time of it to guide that rock, almost as big as himself. But he persevered. H. fot the rock down where he wanted it just as the dinner bell rang. “During the meal the younger man said to him, “«*What were you doing with that rock this afternoon, professor?’ | “ ‘Why,’ the professor answered, ‘the fact is, the thing was six hundred feet too high to suit my theory." SHARP PRACTICE. Andre Autard, the maker of John D. Rockefeller’ wigs, is a plump and e' th thin black hair, he, and black and sparkling eyes. | | M. Autard’s shop is in the best quar- ter of Paris. All the world goes to it| to be shaved and massaged. Recently an American talked to the great hair- jdresser about the exorbitant duty Mr. Rockefeller had to pay on It was sharp tic Autard, in the fluent Engl learned in London. ‘To compel Mr. | Rockefeller to pay such a duty was | hardly honest, but that is the way he |treated in America. It was like the my apprenticeshi: When I was learning my trade, I applied for a position in London. The proprietor engaged me at a certain Sliced oral are mon ti daahen of Ablett's Hitters have be a tive tourist was fi "| tion: the truth may be: tioas told to me,” salary. At the end of our talk he said, “Of course it is understood that you speak both French and English.” “**Yes, sir,’ I responded quickly ; ‘and Dutch also. “**We have no Dutchmen as customers here,’ said he. ‘Therefore I'll take one- third off your salary.’"” ONE WAY OF LOOKING AT IT. During the recent political campaign, the son of acertain United States Sen- ator was running for office. Naturally he was not so well known as his father. Consequently his friends very often had to appeal to the popularity of the father. “Ido not know the candidate,"’ said n old farmer, who was appealed to for is vote. “But you know the father?’ man. ‘Then you will surely vote for his son, won't you?” But the Scotch farmer was still doubt- ful. ‘I'm no’ so sure about that," he replied; “it’s no’ every coo that has a cauff like hersel’."” A PERTINENT ANSWER. John Ridgley Carter, secretary of the American embassy at London—accord- ing to Pearson's Weekly—was piloting | some American friends through the museum at Hastings, when he observed jan unhappy attendant, wearing a mili- tary uniform, with a helmet from which achin strap hung, at whom an inquisi ing all manner of silly questions, The tourist's last question was, what is that strap under your chin for? The attendant sighed. ‘The strap is to ri ji I get tired of an- swel he. SHE HAD A JOB. orms, of the State in his new lectur “Are We Sane or Insane?” t lowing incident in his discussion of th mad rush of American youth to get posi- to get at something that will bring them money “My sister, who served as a mission- asked a raw Norwegian girl if the Lord. ‘Aye got a ary, 01 she didn’t want to serv “Nope,” said the girl. yob."" How France views the present political situation in Germany.—Lz Rire, “Yep; I know him, and he’s a grand | Is the fol-| Eo Se PHILIP MORRIS ORIGINAL LONDON CIGARETTES —a refinement in the way of a cAM smoke BRIDGE the retulo) AMBASSADOR aft In Little HOTEL CU dt . Brown Boxes MBERLAND you comicbooks.com