Judge, 1908-12-05 · page 24 of 44
Judge — December 5, 1908 — page 24: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two satirical pieces from *Judge* magazine (an American humor publication). **"Nuts for Santa To Crack"** (top): A young boy writes a letter to Santa listing absurd, philosophical questions designed to expose logical contradictions in Christmas mythology. He asks how Santa delivers presents to poor people, how reindeer fly, why Santa appears simultaneously everywhere, and why German-made toys are superior if Santa makes them at the North Pole. The satire mocks both the implausibility of Santa and, implicitly, uncritical adult acceptance of the story. **"Too Bad He's So Busy"** (bottom): A hotel clerk refuses to provide a bath to a guest, claiming he's too busy—though he offers a room. The joke satirizes poor hospitality and absurd business excuses (the humor lies in the obvious inadequacy of this reasoning). Both pieces use comedic exaggeration to critique contemporary practices: childhood credulity and commercial/service-industry negligence.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Nuts for Santa To Crack =~ HE Twentieth Century youngster ) PR) carefully {anew ribbon in \ his typewriter, oiled the machine thoroughly : Dean § 18-1 hav about everyt 1 need this Christm: nd in lieu of a collection of gifts | wish you would deliver the an number of ns which wildered you possibly get down when I experienced difficulty in convincing sis- ter’s pet poodle that the trip could be made successfully? Why do you give so many presents to those who have money to buy them, and so few to those who cannot 2 How do you man e ntains and house- tops, when my natural history is susp reindeers wings? What excuse can you offer for bringing father something for mother's house, and presenting mother with a gift for her personal ously silent on the subject of use only? tant one, why do you keep your clothes and whiskers in that old trunk Why do you stack your collection of toys in the stores, thus — jn our storeroom? allowing the children to see them long before the holidays? Anxiously yours, How is it that you can appear simultaneously in the toy sections Cuaumot Gunson, Jn. of the various department a? PERMINE LASHENT, Why do you live at the north pole, when it ix an accepted fact GEOGRAPHICAL. that the best toys are made in Germany? Don’t you feel silly sleighing in Florida, where there isn’t any snow? And as the final question, but not necessarily the most unimpor- TOO BAD HE'S sO Busy. W Sumzeott Soyld—"* 1 want a room and a bath : Hotel clerk—* 1 can give you a room, but I haven't got time to give you a bath," comicbooks.com