Judge, 1908-10-24 · page 16 of 24
Judge — October 24, 1908 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several brief satirical pieces typical of early 20th-century Judge magazine: **"The Ammunition Was Bad"** depicts an Irish immigrant ("Hibernian") who purchased ineffective moth-killing pellets from a chemist and returns angry—a simple ethnic humor sketch playing on Irish dialect for comedic effect. **"Will Not Down"** mocks political campaign speeches where candidates speak grandly about "vital principles" while a heckler shouts that what voters actually want is a cheap cigar—satirizing the gap between political rhetoric and ordinary citizens' modest concerns. **"That Local Dema[gogery]"** continues this theme: a campaign worker promises to "fire imaginations," but a farmer replies they'd rather have corrupt officials removed so "our friends" get those jobs—satirizing machine politics and self-interested reform. The remaining pieces are brief joke items on unrelated topics (insurance, cocktails, romance). Overall, the page reflects Judge's focus on lampooning political speeches, ethnic stereotypes, and urban social dynamics of the era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THE AMMUNITION WAS BAD. The brawny Irishman craned over t big glass case in the chemist’s sh eventually managed to locate the diminu- tive proprietor. LCE LDA Wud ye plaze give me somethin’ to kill moths?" he asked, and was prompt ae | supplied with a packet of camphor ba : Good-di sir,’’ said the businesslike chemist briskly.” “I hope I shall soon have the pleasure of seeing you again,” He saw him again quite soon, but it happens, it was with no particu pleasure. “‘Ar-re you th’ mooney-faced little imp that sowld me these balls?” shouted th Hibernian, rushing in later on in the day. In his nervousness the man of pills that he was. “Well, thin,’ howled the Irishman, jist you come home wid me, an’ if ye can hit a single moth wid wan iv these little haythen pellets. I'll spare ye th’ thrashin’ y erwise, say nothin’ about th’ WILL NOT DOWN. “After all, my friends," said the campaign spellbinder, “vital principles never change. Questions of expediency may arise to cloud the real and living issues from time to time, but the themselves are the same from genc tion to general Political parties, in the main, agree as to aims. It isa tials of our civilization?” “A good five-cent cigar!" shouted an enthusiastic hearer on the outskirts of the crowd. —Chicago Tribune, THAT LOCAL DEMA! “We will give you some or will fire your imaginations, campaign worker. “Tdunno’s I want anybody's imagina- tion fired,"’ answered Farmer Corntos- “What we want is to get some of Hers that's holdin’ office fired, so's e our friends a chance." Wash- ington Star. The Very Newest Idea in Life Insurance. Live INSURANCE Pays THE IteNT AND THE GRo- en's BILLS ‘ors who: aid the Is ABottled Delight A mixcd-by-guesswork cocktail | can never be as good as y expect. A Crus CocktaiL always a good cocktail because it is measure mixed, an exquisite blend of rare old liquors, aged in wood. Here is something really “different.” fo Insure CLUB COCKTAILS are the THE RULES OF ‘THE GAME. only perfect cockt Hatsman (in danger of being put out by small brothe—"* Drop it, “Elbert, or you go! Martini (gin hase), Manhattan (whiskey use), are universal favorites wen UNENTHUSIASTIC. HADN'T FORGOTTEN. London **Some of the greatest minds in the Mixs Screecher—*L wonder Unele | m country are now at work on the problem Jim remembered me when he made his of improving farm conditions."* will? used to sing for him.” | ** answered Farmer Corntossel; | Lawyer—"'Yes, he evidently remem. | pra esctnyy Imes “that’s one trouble "bout farmin’. Too | bered you—at least your name isn’t men-| ‘With the New Monthly 1 many of us want to be workin’ our minds tioned in the document." — Chicago | dentis) the husband and father ean, up | ‘atid o' workin’ our land.""—Washington | News. form, a Policy to pay the rent and the househabt | Star. OTs cove moat of tt. ren in echool when = | A MARTIAL DREAM | gad training sine ucent chil. It providen f | food, clothing and education by a fied reyular PAN | Mrs. Knicker—'1 heard you talking | monihly payment which cannot fail atively small cos nich this aleneet Mies Antique—‘‘Just think of the in your sleep about setting them up There —| nerve of that impecunious fellow to pro- | again,’* Frade ia ancther attractive f HENRY LINDENMEYR & SONS Pose to m Knicker—** my dear; that is a, Meain PAPER WAREHOUSE!” Miss Caustique—‘Nerve? Why, it! military exere New York Sun. | wtifi?& Me York, | WAS absolute recklessness. "—Milwankee Dyearsin ALL KINI OF PAPER MADE TO ORDER | Ne tle ce reat cree GIFTS Diamonds = FATHER AND SON. I tell you, sir,” thundered old ley, “if it wasn't for me you'd be the most forlorn and disreputable crea- ture in this neighborhood.” for you, pop,” retorted young t be able to claim first honors until you die.""—Philadelphia F snesnnth Taye alates eur icee | Preas, Oi Credit GIFTS For Chistnas Presets circ FTIS : f comicbooks.com