Judge — October 3, 1908 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WOULD PAY IN ADVANCE. YOUNG Scotch farmer, who could not read, came into { a small country city directly after an“ anti-spitting ordinance had come into effect, and, as fate would have it, was walking directly toward the single policeman of which the place boasted when the period of release for a copious amount of tobacco juice became due. The profuse squirt lit with a splash directly in the middle of the sid walk, and the was subsequently t e by the copper and hustled before the police m When told of the nature of his offense he warmly pro- tested ignorance of the law, but was informed that this did not shield him, At t istrate’s he pleaded ilty, and was fined five dollars and costs. This tots seven dollars and fifty cent With painful dignity the young kiltie drew forth a ’ tendollar bill, which he © the place. allet and extracted therefr ed upon the desk and turned to} “Wait a mom my frien cailed the officer. * Here is your chang * Nae, mon, Ewinna tak’ it," « WANTED TO KNOW. hildren have you?" you the census taker, or are you Caller ** How man Leascible female Ar utify the curiosity of Mr. Roosevelt AMENITIES. as you won't marty me, L shall have nd T should start early, if 1 were look fora gitl whe will.” » for it'll take some tin asking just to Curly locks, curly locks, THE SAUSAGE KING. Wilt thou be mine? Yes: this is bargain day lives F, put stones in the oyster stew), adistant isle where the pretzels are, (Butter your hair and try a few.) His ways are nners ru His tastes rt Tut he irs them with frank fortitude. ster stew.) crude, canine bark (Wai in the oyster stew), German pienie in the park o tter your hair and try a few.) He built his how aside hill bleak, And the roof of the blooming. thing would leak, So he couldn't live in it once a week. (Waiter, more stones in the oyster stew.) A queer old chap is the sausage king (Waiter, put stones in the oyster stew) ; He's given to eating most any old things. (Butter your hair and t For his Sausageship is sorely eurst, With nothing to drink and a burning thirst, And his children go from worse to wurst (Waiter, more stones in the oyster stew.) But I'd like to live on the $ Isle (Waiter, put stones in the oyster stew), Where they r very style your hair and try a few), food ix fat and the talk is Duteh, ever amounts t ny a crematory. Queer soca there, for Lik aiter, I'm done with th g his living by urning his dead." NOT SO IN CANADA. Man (to side) Wh « o'clock. Man L thought it was more than tw Koy ver sets more than twelve in this country. Begins at one again. ARDENTLY DESIRED. Mes. Henpeck There’ ho use in your trying to dis pute what Tsay. Pim deter mined to have the last word. ”? TEAL, DERENDS Mr, Hen peek * You don't seem to realize 'm delicate, But to prepare and di all the cooking to entertain a lot of lady and this housework is simply using me up! friends about twice a week is mete pleasure willing you shoul, - awe It soo! Te will kill me” only di comicbooks.com