Judge — August 1, 1908 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

eee REFLECTIONS OF UNCLE EZRA. ERTAINLY it is getting so nowad: clothes and hair-cut whether he Many women are not as bad When I ys you can’t tell from a feller’s is a rube or a genius. years, I always think that her husband must have died before got very inted with him, If Roosevelt gets too strong with his nature-fakin’ charges he will git to be disliked in my town for bein’ too pussonal, ‘Those of us who ain't alse teeth have got g cork legs, arti- ficial hair, cold-cream complexions or dyed whiskers. Hod P of our town is so stingy he makes his wife write all her letters in shorthand, so as to save ink. It may be all right to belong to the Four Hundred, but, by gravy! I'd hate to have any of the Four Hundred belong to me. ‘Vhey say accidents will happen in the best of families, and accordin’ to reports from Pittsburgh, most of them do. I never sce a married woman who didn’t cry at a weddin’ and wish the couple much joy she was wipin’ her nose. Yon't make fun of an old maid, A woman who is an old maid at thutty may ing young widder at thutty-five with a life-insurance roll. Job may have had boils, but, by jing! he never gral dark bedroom and put it in his mouth by mistake for a ci government laws on substitution may be pretty strict, but they can’t prevent us usin’ a good old buckwheat pancake for a porous plaster. Anybody can write for a magazine, but it won't be sent unless the subscription ix in advane Education is a great thing. A school teacher who is extra eflici dollars a month. A plumber gets Mi Huggins says he ean't afford an automobile as the old gray mare lives he has got a good spark-plug, anyhow. I know a feller who is usin’ four hoop snakes for rubber tires on his buggy, and [ain't any nature faker either. whi lash- wed his wife's hot curlin’-iren ina fr nt can get thutty-fi dollars a day. + his gal out ridin’ in, but as long ROY K. MOULTON. HER BAG. TPPWAS just fh women el In sunshine and in rain, He looked upon it as at ything for the to destroy ailly planned i nd ngg one day Of everything on Within a dry als store INVINCIBLE. 66.YOU YANKEES Y about your British tourist, as th 3 but tell me all the splendors of your anything to “Out in I are eternally bragging said the travelers visited Ve- psxessions, friend, where in untry have yol jual this voleano oln, Nebraska,” Ame dof it,’ s “* Whatd nings Bryan," Fhe man contemptuously, “William J American. THE SAUCY SEESAW. ort named Chi and toss her. a thud, fell in the mud, * Such a saucy seesaw [ne'er saw, sir!" A CAMPAIGN RUMOR T IS said that a good many people will vote the Prohibition ticket this fall under the im- pression that under its administration money will no longer get tight. A JOLT “Have you h perfectly dreadtul “Why, no, sweetheart, What is it?” pirid person is going to build an nt house between us. Hoo-hoo '” FOR CU rd the news, Charlie? Irs apar STYLES FOR HORSES DURING DOG - DAYS THE The way our horses will look this summer. din 66 SHALL my dear, : “I'm fond of calves-brains, but I think ry are better for luncheon than for dinner; and besides, they are not served on the hoof this year.” comicbooks.com