Judge — June 13, 1908 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PERS Bits of Encouragement from Our Friends. THE SAILORS HEARD FROM. Dear Jun Your Golden Gate num- ber certainly is a ‘‘corker.”” It has made all kinds of hits with the boys— they are scrapping for ‘ next!" and all declare it is something unique in the line of ** fleet numbers.” Sorry you didn’t include the Pacific fleet in your contest. Some of the “* slopers,”’ in eight hundred words, would make you believe they owned the Horn. They've converted me all right, for they can certainly ‘ tootit ' some. Abe Ruef is likely to get another ad- journment, for there will be a ity of Jupces on the coast, as the sailors are to buy th all up and send them home to the ‘‘old people’? and to the other people's people. Yours very truly, WE STAND REPROVED! The following, clipped from the Red- lands Daily Facts, was sent us by the editor of that jealous guardian of its city’s honor: “Rather Poor Joke. “In the Golden Gate number of JupcE, dated April 25th, Redlands is brought prominently to the front in the following : “** Driver —** How long'll it take me ter git to Redlands?” “" Boy —** Well, judgin’ by yer rig, three months.” ? The above follows a cut showing an jent equipage drawn by a decrepit- looking animal. “If the remaining jokes are not bet- ter than the above, it would seem that i$ not equally up-to-date with the ich it attempts to boom by its issue.’ A LETTER WORTH HAVING. Editor Jupce Dear The directors of the Me chants’ Exchange of Oakland, Cal., di sire to express their appreciation of the Golden Gate number of your esteemed publication. Yesterday thousands of residents of California and other portions of the Pacific slope witnessed the dramatic cle of the entry of the flect into co Bay, with Admiral Evans on the bridge of the flagship Connecticut. ‘The citizens of the Pacific slope we come spirit. which prompted your spe ition, demonstrating to us that the Atlantic and ie oceans wash the shores of one united nation. Again we thank you. Sincerely yours, Winner WALKER, retary Merchants’ Exchany Oakland, of THE SEN’ ‘BETTER THAN Dear Jupce: Inclosed you will find Nothing but The price of your Optimistic Doughnut, The value of which, To the common-sense thinker, Will go a great way ‘To down the poor “ sinker."” So het to the land As an idle be And here’ J.D. Bospeck, Kansas Cit, Gentlemen: Will you please send me a doughnut for the inclosed stamps. 1 am very much like the man in the last issue: ‘It’s the best thing I ever saw. ONAL! ! Also send_me the best remedy (no, not Peruna) for heart failure. Our cook picked up one of my Jupces and read an | anecdote on the Merry Widow hats. She turned red, pink, yellow, and all the colors of the rainbow, and dropped. After I had used all the ice-water w had in the house, she awakened. ‘*Oh, she says, ‘* they do say the most horrib things about us girls!"? (meaning the union or bunch in our neighborhood). Dinner an hour late. Well, 1 must say Yours trul Joun W. Carter. What is the matter with Ner Sick or laying off? 1 don’t see him so often lately. I Judge Company : | Gentlemen—Inclosed find a two-cent | stamp, for which please send me a dough- nut. It may not be good to eat, but, to an anti-pessimist, it's a darn sight bet- ter than a dinner at ** Seelbach’s."” Thanking you in advance, 1 remain, Very truly yours, Cc. W. Harryma P.$. [notice in current edition one of your readers makes a motion that you reinstate our genial friend, ‘* Nervy Nat,” to his rightful place in your paper. I hereby second that motion, and hope it will be carried by a rising vote. Otherwise de-light-ed. Judge Company : Gentlemen—Inclosed find a_ sil dime, for which send me by mail fiv “doughnuts.” ‘They are the best thing. *—the quintessence of Ame canism, optimism, or faith in the glori- ous future of our country, The city letter-carriers of Rushville are with you on the doughnut proposition, and want to wear them all the day long. Very respectfully, 1, Secretary Branch J.P. Str N. A. of L 878, Judge Company: When 1 saw about doughnut button, but was afraid ii "s cleverest jok ending for th to wear on me nothing better has pression-buster sinc one » for peen evolved for de- you put out the full dinner pail. Have you cut, that could be put out on’ stationery to help the cause and the printer? If you to send five buttons for stamps in- closed, will try and induce the other fel- Fone for the good that it may Yours very gratefully, Joux Meteat Editor low to wei do. F from a dot on the map of Kentucky to express 4 his (as well as the Klub’s) appreciation of the variety of wit puplished in your excellent magazine ome folks like just certain kind of t, but anything handed out by dunce: gets my gout. Yours through ty, HP. Moreny, ary Klub Kentuck, Judge Company : Jentlemen Confined to my house by ness, my doctor advises @ ton 1 choose‘ Nervy Nat Adventures,"” so please send to my house address bound * also bound volume of ‘* Nerv . * for which I in- volume * Teddy Be close check, amount $1.55, which in- cludes exchang. , If among your publications you h other tonics equal to ‘* Nervy Nat, please advise me. Sincerely yours, J.P. Littierietp. "TWAS EVER THUS. The optimist sees the doughnut, The pessimist sees the hole.” RS. G A POLITE HUSBAND. A husband was being arraigned in the Court of First Instance in a suit brought by his wife for eru “Lunderstand, Mr. Gale, addre: ‘one of the ind upon your wif spoken to her for three years, so?” It is," quietly answered the hus- band. “Well, sir," thundered Mr. Gale, “why don’t you speak to her, may I ask? j “Simply,” replied the husband, “* be- cause I did not want to interrupt her.” Philippines ir,”? said the coun husband, ** tha 41 have showered ix that you have not Js that UNsi pre THE SEATS WERE SAFE. me “nt Stout, 0 to the the Have Miss Vera “Oh, now," h “you're not xo heavy asa Catholic Times. ts By Janes Montcomory Place ANOTHER BRIDGE SCANDAL Motogeavure QSend & cents for our illutrated catalogue of beautiful prints ‘The following conversation is said to have tak: Old la soir da t Old ta dow! Werat Old lady en pla dy lor boy dy lor boy Elevator boy BE Wateh Pictures By James Montgomery Flage Copyright, 1996, by Juge Co. HOLDING HANDS We Old lady evatur bay Old lady levator boy d. “Don't you ever feel sick up and down in this elevator all “Is it the motion of going “* What is it, then?”’ The Truth Can be told about Great Western Champagne : 3 See, fermented and aged'to exact pertec: tion for healthtatness, possessing the. bou: Guet and favor that received a GOLD MEDAL.” PLEASANT VALLEY WINE CO., Sole Makers, Rheims, N.Y. in a Boston elevator: “Yea'm,"" No'm."* motion going up?" stopping?”’ No'm.”" T The + questions. fo sepia, 4849, comicbooks.com