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Judge, 1908-05-23 · page 15 of 16

Judge — May 23, 1908 — page 15: what you’re looking at

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Judge — May 23, 1908 — page 15: Judge, 1908-05-23

What you’re looking at

This page features **Judge magazine's satirical poetry contest** predicting the 1908 U.S. presidential election. The context: President Theodore Roosevelt had pledged not to seek another term, creating uncertainty about his successor. **Key figures referenced:** - **William Howard Taft** (overwhelmingly favored in submissions—310 of 660 entries) - **Theodore Roosevelt** (the outgoing president) - **William Jennings Bryan** (three-time Democratic candidate, repeatedly mocked as weak/"small") - **Charles Evans Hughes** (Supreme Court justice, alternative choice) **The satire's point:** Judge presents winning poems mocking various candidates while celebrating Taft as the obvious choice. Bryan is ridiculed as diminished ("small," having "the blight"). One poem jokes that Roosevelt won't actually leave office. The contest itself satirizes both political prognostication and public sentiment—showing how business and establishment interests (represented by Judge's readership) preferred the safe, conservative Taft over Bryan's progressive populism. The surrounding advertisements reinforce the magazine's upper-class, male-oriented audience.

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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUNIOR Satety Razor GEM ‘The Gem hand-work of the barber, falses the baits vertically. & scraping, Junior with the New Bar does the lightens the aki and ing a pertect, close, Lather and Each Gem Junior town . wie. A atarictte GEM CUTLERY COMPANY New ¥« If price were a criterion of value PHILIP MORRIS ORIGINAL LONDON CIGARETTES Would command a higher premium than any other Turkish Cigarette in the world. he just does me."’—Exchange. NEW YORK CITY THE HERMITAGE A CLUB HOTEL FOR MEN ‘The name tells the story Seventh Avenue and Forty-second Street roadway Restaurant on the street floor, a restaurant where ladies are welcome. Every other part of the house for exclusively men. Telephones in every room. Respectful, quiet, obedient and alert Japa- ese servants, Bedroom and bath $2.00 a é : day upward. | Send for Rooklet ' T. F. PADDELL, Proprietor PROPHECIES OF JUDGE POETS. “Who Will Be Our Next President, and Why?" Our prize contest for the best “ porm " of less than 40 words, answering the above uvestion, has had interesting results.” Out of 6d pocts, 310 were for Taft. 80 for Hiushes, 10 for Roosevelt, © for Bryan, 10 for La Follette, and 69 indefinite. One hundred and sixty were from Eastern States, 110 from the and 380 from the West. ‘The ten prizes are awardeal as follows, with special prizes to the first three 1904—1908 The thorn which ‘neath the rose he felt Has vanished, figures Willie For, “‘ Nay, no more!”” says Theodore, He’s right; so watch the Orator— He'll get there, willy nilly. Carl Stephenson, Greencastle, Ind. UNCLE SAM'S SOLILOQUY. Sweet William’s th’ pop'lar flower this year, An’ Taft is th’ comin’ kind, thet’s clear; It’s big an’ white an’ stands th’ light, But Bryan’s small an’ hez th’ blight. Miss Ella L. Beers, Bridgeport, Conn. BY ELIMINATION. Taft's size, Fairbanks’s drinks, Bryan's views, Cannon's stogie— ob, yes, they amuse But we shall take pains To choose one whose brains Are his recommendation. That's Hughes! Verne W. Tucker, Detroit, Mich. AN OPTIMIST. With Taft in the President's chair, | All things will be done on the THE WINNE! fall the returns be in, candidates, tall, stout, or thin. I've the strongest conviction, There'll be plent: And make the prediction, And th heed thoes ‘That the one that’s elected will win. When William succeeds Teddy there iT Carol Vox, Newton, Mass. A. S. King, Cincinnati, O. THIRD TERM. h Taft, Johnson, Bryan and Hughes Show up strong in political news; But the people will say, “Teddy Roosevelt, you stay And the Strenuous One won't refuse. W. F. Howes, Boston, Mass. WRITTEN ON ST. PATRICK'S DAY. Youse’ll see, Hughes’ll be Our next Mister Prisident; For ‘tis he’s fit to be | Our own White House risident. | Charles Gray, Sterling, Il. THE BIG FELLOW. z, bouncing, buster Bill Taft, active, opponent of graft, By the popular voice Will be the next choice ‘To manwuvre the national craft. R. C. Whitehouse, Auburn, Me. EULOGY. Full of wisdom, full of worth, For President, best man on earth! He'll carry out our Teddy's plan, That's why Taft's the coming man. Jay Humphrey, Spokane, Wash. SOME IRISH FOR TAFT. Said weary old Patrick O’Brien, “ For a full dinner pail I've been sighin’. , but don’t fear, Taft will be there next year, And no chance at all has Bill Bryan."* 5. B. Wayman, Baltimore, Md. And we add the following five as examples of the wide variety of replies received : Says Teddy, ‘* As chief of this nation, I aver without hesitation, I'll have four years more, ’Cause the bankers are sore And the ‘ grafters’ are full of vexation!"" J. Mahlon Duganne, Altoona, Pa. Taft! Who always laft; And because no graft; And Bryan daft. ‘That's my shaft! ‘Wood, Minneapolis, Minn. | It matters not who mans the boats, In safety our ship of state floats. He who wins in ’08, Also why, we dare state, Will be he who secures the most votes! William B. Delancy, Oak Park, Ill. ident, Robert La Féllette. He's the man, and no doubt He will boost’ them all out. That's why we should give him our baliot. Loyd Wor jeven years old, Wy- more, If you save money, you're # grouch; If you spend it, you're a loafer; If you get it, you're a grafter; If you don’t get it, you're a bum. ** So I don't want to win a prize,”" L. H. Semper, New York City. | You can pick out “any kind of shirt you like and be sure you will like it, if the name ‘“‘Cluett”’ is on it. ett SHIRTS $7.50 and more ew anki LOTT, PeAnODY A. Troy, NY Mak: ‘A MEAN RETORT. Her husband—* Oh, L wish I had never jearned to play poker.” His wife’ You mean you wish you pad learned, don't you?" Chicago Ne The Association of American Advertisers has examined and certified to the circulation of this publication. The detail report of such examination is on file at the New York office of the Association, No other figures of circulation guaranteed. comicbooks.com