Judge, 1908-02-22 · page 6 of 16
Judge — February 22, 1908 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several unrelated humorous pieces typical of Judge magazine's format: **"Not His Fault"** (top left): A moral fable where a wealthy young woman ignores a wise man's three life options (charity work, marry for love, marry nobility). She marries a poor man who squanders her fortune, then a nobleman who abuses her. The punch line: her failures resulted from not following his original advice—she chose wrong from the start. **The remaining content** consists of light humor pieces: a "News Item" about a fantastical creature; "Definitions by Small William" (a recurring feature offering children's humorous definitions of everyday words); "Learned at the Old Swimmin' Hole" (children's bath-time dialog); and "Hee Haw!" (a joke about someone betting their ears). The illustrations are generic satirical drawings typical of early-20th-century American humor magazines. No specific political figures or events are referenced—this is pure entertainment content aimed at general audiences.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
NOT HIS FAULT. NCE girl with barrels of money. there was a young And not knowing what t with it, she consulted man. He lived all alone tent he had built for the pur pple life pose, leading as When the y was presented to him, he said, “There are three things that i sirl's you ean do: “ First, voucan be anold maid 4] devote yourself to charit “Second, marry the mar your heart. “Th So the young marry a nobleman,” irl went away and pondered, and while she was pondering a nice young fellow came along. He was poor but handsome, with broad shoulders and so forth, and she fell in But after they ha love with him and married hi been married a littl while, he yrew suddenly extravagant, have squandered all her money had he not been Then the young girl marrie nobleman, And after they hi the nature of all true been living together for several years, he, noblemen, began to abuse her. At bist, not being able to stand it any longer, she secured a permanent divorce ‘Then she went back to the wise man 1, “your advice has been very dis olf 2” man, “because you didn't “Oh, wise im n,” she astrous. What have you to sty for ye “Ttwas your fault," suid) the follow it.” “What de you mean ¢ 1" en the wise man laughed heartily. Don't you see,” he “now that it is too kite, that you began on the wrong end NEWS ITEM. A BINGLEBOO was discovered in the Brinx woods last Septo- her. [had poetic feet and a fairy tail WASTED MATERIAL. “ Speak louder, boy ; Pin a little dh * Gee, wot's de use of all dem ears DEFINITIONS BY SMALL WILLIAM. Dust—Mud with the juice squeezed out. Jce—Water that stayed out too lute and went to sleep. Fan—M thi Stomach 4¢ to brush warmth off with, The home of the swallow. Salt—That what makes your potatoes taste bad if you don’t put some in Junction—A place where two railroads separate, Wakejulness—When your eyes are all the time coming un buttoned Kesponsibility—What would be on one button if the other ene should come off my trousers. Admittanre—Vrice twenty-tive cents; chil- dren under twelve, fifteen cents. When a feller has low temperature, he has cold feet; when he has high, he’s hot-headed. DIFFICULT “There's La estate if L LEARNED AT THE OLD SWIMMIN'’ HOLE. Tro children stood in their kitchen watching ay when suddet “| makes it bubble up?” Vl sell him. some real- get his ear for 3 chicken soup warming on the stove, it began to bubble. inquired the litte girl, “what “There's a chicken in thet explained the little boy, “and it’s tryin’ to talk under water SUPPLY IN DANGER OF EXHAUSTION “Did yuh hear that Si Hu: ! Why, th for himself 2" HEE HAW! Jones—* Right? P'm sure Pm right! Tl bet my ears on it!” teady, old man; don’t go to such extreme lengths comicbooks.com a EEE AE