Judge — December 28, 1907 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

BETWEEN THE EYES. He—* Why, I see in all races the man’s brain averages ten per cent. heavier than the brain of the woman. She—" The same thing may be said of, a man’s feet ; but they are no more useful to him than are a woman's feet to her !"| —Yonkers Statesman, NOT LITERALLY. “ Whiskey,” said the parson to the man with the crimson beak, “is your greatest enemy.” « Perhaps it is,” rejoined the old round- but doesn't the good book admon- ish us to love our enemies ?” | « Yes,” answered the parson ; * but not to swallow them.” —Chicago News. TO BE DECIDED FOR HER. The old man laid down his newspaper. “My child,” he said to the fair girl in sables who had just come in, her cheeks pink and her eyes shining from the frosty air; ‘my child, Lam unspeakably shocked and grieved. Your mother informs me that you are engaged to five young men at once. But his daughter laughed and patted| his shoulder in reassuring fashion. “Dear old stupid dad; it’s all right,” she said, “They are football players, | — and at the end of the season I shall wed the survivor.” “Oh!” said the father, and, his brow clearing, he resumed his reading.—New York Press. THOUSANDS have discarded the idea of making their own cocktails —all will after givi the CLUB COCKTAILS a fair trial. "Scientifically blended from the choicest old liquors and mellowed with age make them the perfect cocktails that they are. Seven kinds, most popular of which are Martini (Gin base), Manhattan (Whiskey base). The following label appears on every bottle : underthe Fe Or 30th, 1906. Serial G. F, HEUBLEIN & BRO., Sole Props. UNREASONABLE. + De doctor says yo’ mus’ drink lots o° chicken broth, Ephraim,” said Mrs. John- son, an’ stay in out o' de night air.” How am I to git chicken broff if I can't go out in de night air? Dat's what | I want ter know."—Delaware County Democrat. EXCHANGE OF CIVILITIES. | Pears A. DE LUZE & FILS BORDEAUX CLARETS SAUTERNES soto By PARK GTILFORD, JOHN WAGNER & Sons, NEW YORK. PHILADELPHIA. S.C. HERBST IMPORTING CO., MILWAUKEE. GOLDBERG, BOWEN & CO., SAN FRANCISCO. S. S. PIERCE CO., BOSTON, GENERAL AGENTS FOR THE UNITED STATES, ADE LUZE efi ToRDEAUK FRANCE HAUT-SAUTERNES BORDEAUX FRANCE aire mocTuNaoTHSCERY of a STRICTLY FIRST- Plano, or Piano and. Sell-Player combined, Shoot ‘not fail to examine the merits Of the world: Pears’ Soap has never offered premiums to | induce sales. It is, in itself, a prize for the complexion. 4 the surpa: SOHMER CECILIAN™ Inside Players, all other talogue mailed om application. SOHMER & COMPANY, New York. Warerooms: Cor. Sth Ave. 224 St as Every time a man puts his foot in it he Established in 1789. feels like kicking himself.—£x. A Confederate veteran met his former body-guard on the road. | “Is that you, Peter?” he called to the| old negro, who was grinning as he doffed | his hat. “Yas, suh ; dis am me." | “Well, well!" laughed the other. “1] see that all the old fools'are not dead yet.” *Dat's so, Mars’ Tom.” Peter pulled his grisly forelock appreciatively. “I's mons'us glad to see dat you's in such good health, suh,"—Lippincott's. AN OBJECTION. The pay-as-you-go-in street-car is likely to cause a riot when two women, each in- tent on paying the other's fare, get wedged in the entrance.—Minneapolis Fournal, A PROBLEM. Otp maro—"* How I long to be faith- ful to some one—if I only knew whom." —Fliegende Blatter. THE UNREQUITED LOVE They say the Baby's clinging love Is likened best To heaven above. Ot heaven's delights Thave a doubt ; T'd say, off-hand, To cut it out. Copyright, Judge Co., 1907. UNREQUITED LOVE Photogelatine in sepia, 8x 11, 25 cents, JUDGE COMPANY 22s Fourrn Ave. Niw Yorn THE JUDGE COMPANY’S MAGAZINES Circulation Over One Million Copies magazines and our quarterly, as advertising mediums suitable for any ar- ticle intended for family use. The paid circulation of JUDGE'S LIBRARY, accord- ing to figures furnished by the Association of American Advertisers, averages 41,826 monthly, making a tal of nearly $00,000 copies a year. The circulation of SIS HOPKINS’ OWN BOOK, ac- cording to the sante author- ity, averages 36,576 month- ly,'a total of over 400,000 1 copies a year. The circulation of JUDGE'S QUARTERLY averages more than 26,000 each issue. The magazines sell for ten cents acopy, the quarterly for twenty-five cents a copy. There are no copies given away and none returned. The subscription list is large enough to satisfy the requirements of the United States Government, but probably ninety-eight per cent. of all this vast output is sold for cash through the news companies. Here is a circulation each year of over 1,000,000 copies of illustrated periodicals with covers printed in colors. And this is an ever-changing circulation, so that there is hardly any duplication, month by month, such as there would be by an all sub- scription list. Specimen copies and advertising rates on request. Special rates furnished where an advertiser uses the entire twenty-eight magae zines during one year. The JUDGE COMPANY, 225 Fourth Ave., New York City Sworn LEASE allow us to call your attention SiS HOPKINS OWR BOOK even LiCl SF as OI ere comicbooks.com